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- 9

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Have you seen our bank statement?
Can this be right?
I know. God, I haven't seen
my savings take a hit like this...
...since I was a kid and they came up
with Double Stuf Oreos.
-What happened to all of our money?
-I'm not sure exactly what they did...
...but I'm inclined to blame Enron.
With you doing the internship, we're
spending more than we're bringing in.
Yeah, maybe I should quit
and get a job that pays.
But you're finally doing something
that you love.
I mean, I can't ask you to give that up.
Although it would be nice if the thing
that you loved was finding gold.
You know, I think we're making
too big a deal out of this.
We'll pay our bills late this month. Next
month we'll cut back on a few things.
And maybe we start eating
out of Joey's refrigerator for a change.
You're a chef. What can you make
out of baking soda and beer?
Worst-case scenario is, we borrow
some money from my parents.
No, we're not borrowing money.
-Why not?
-We don't do that. We are Bings.
If there's one thing my father
taught me, it was...
...well, to always knock
before going into the pool house.
-The other thing is, never borrow money.
-I had no idea you had this much pride.
That's right, I do. I am your man.
I'm gonna get us through this situation...
...even if it means you working
twice as hard.
The One With the Boob Job
-I'm gonna go.
-Why?
I haven't been home in days,
and I need to get more clothes.
You don't have to go.
I have something that'll fit you.
I put that tube top on as a joke.
-I want you to stay.
-I want to stay too.
But I've got as much use
out of these boxers as I can.
-Why don't you turn them inside--
-Done it.
-I'll be back in a couple of hours.
-All right. I'll miss you.
Me too.
You know what? I just realized
something. I don't want to go home.
-Great! Okay, I'll go get the tube top.
-No, no, what I mean is...
...I hate going back
to my apartment now.
Partly because I live above
a known crack den...
...but, you know, mostly because
when I'm there, I really miss you.
So...
...do you want to move in together?
Wow, Mike Hanigan...
...you sure know how to
make a girl say "Hell, yeah."
-So we're doing it?
-Yeah, let's do it. Let's live together.
-We're really gonna move in together?
-Yeah.
I've always wanted to live with a guy.
Pick up your socks.
Put down the toilet seat.
No, we are not having sex anymore.
It's gonna be fun.
-Hey, Joey.
-Hey.
Listen, I need to know
that what I'm about to ask you...
...will never get back to Chandler.
I'd be lying if I said I hadn't
thought about it myself.
But Chandler is my best friend.
It would be wrong.
Good, but wrong.
Okay, first of all, it would be great.
But that's not what I'm here to talk
to you about. I need to borrow money.
Oh, I don't know, Monica.
You know...
...lending friends money
is always a mistake.
-But Chandler lent you money.
-And he would tell you it was a mistake.
Come on, I just.... I need it
for some rent and some other bills.
Well, how much?
-Two thousand dollars?
-Two thousand dollars?
What do you think I am,
a soap opera star?
-Yeah.
-That's right, I am.
-Hi, you guys.
-Hey.
-What's in the bag?
-You know how Emma started crawling?
I realized that this place
is very unsafe for a baby...
...so I went to the store and I got some
stuff to baby-proof the apartment.
Oh, God, baby-proofing.
Why is it such a big deal now?
You know, when I was a kid, it was like:
"Whoops, Joey fell down the stairs."
Or, "Whoops, Joey electrocuted
himself again."
Anyway, are you going to get
a handyman to install this stuff?
No, I was just gonna do it myself.
-You're gonna do it?
-Yeah. Why?
-You don't think a woman can do this?
-Women can. You can't.
Monica, will you please tell Joey
that he is a pig.
-You're a pig. And you can't do this.
-What?
What? Come on, I found
the hardware store all by myself.
The store's right down the street.
There is a hardware
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