done with that?
Okay, fine. Fine.
Let's talk about snow.
Do you think it's snowing in Tulsa where
my husband's having sex on a copier?
-Hey.
-Oh, my God.
Look at that.
That's a Christmas miracle!
-What are you doing here?
-I wanted to be with you.
I missed you so much.
-Hey, hey. Who'd you miss the most?
-Monica.
Gotcha.
-I never want to leave you again.
-I thought if you left, you'd get fired.
Turns out they can't fire me.
Because I quit.
-What?
-What? You--? You really quit your job?
Yeah. It was a stupid job,
and I could not stand leaving you.
Why should I be the only one who
doesn't do what he really wants to do?
-Well, what do you really wanna do?
-I have not thought this through.
-Oh, my God.
-I know. I should've talked to you first.
No, I think that this is what
you wanna do. I think it's great!
Thanks.
Chandler, your being here is the best
Christmas present I could ever imagine.
-Now give me my real gift.
-Yeah.
-Thank you.
-Here, pass those around.
"A donation has been made in your name
to the New York City Ballet."
How did you know?
What? Are you kidding?
I can't return this.
It's time we started thinking about
other people.
And besides, this gift still says,
"I love you guys."
-Mine says, "To Lillian Myers."
-I don't have a job.
Actuary? No.
Bookkeeper? No.
Topless dancer?
Hey, you know what I just realized?
You are the sole wage earner.
You are the head of the household.
I don't do anything. I'm a kept man!
You are.
Honey, here's 20 bucks.
Go buy yourself something pretty
while I'm at work tomorrow.
Subtitles by
SDI Media Group
ripped by Bozoleclown
for friendsnet.fr.fmGood morning, tiger.
I'm making you a big breakfast, so you
can keep up your strength for tonight.
You're gonna get me
good and pregnant.
I've got nowhere to go this morning.
I'm unemployed.
I don't know what
I'm gonna do with my life.
Well, I just lost my erection.
No, I mean, what am I supposed
to do with myself?
You're supposed to find
your passion in life.
You can be whatever you want
to be now. It's exciting.
Yeah, but it's all so overwhelming.
I don't know where to start.
Wait a second.
I can help you with this.
You just need to be organized. We can
make a list of your qualifications...
...and categorize jobs by industry.
There could be folders and files--
Hey, this is where your hyper-organized
pain-in-the-ass stuff pays off.
I know!
My erection is back!
The One Where Rachel Goes Back to Work
Thank you.
Joey, could I have a sip of your coffee
and a bite of your muffin?
-Okay.
-Thank you.
Thank you.
Pheebs, have you ever been bitten
by a hungry ltalian?
I'm sorry.
It's just, I'm a little short on cash.
If you want,
I could loan you some money.
Oh, no. I learned never to
borrow money from friends.
That's why Richard Dreyfuss
and I don't speak anymore.
Hey, how about this?
Wanna be an extra on my show?
You could do that?
The pay's pretty good, and you
could do it for as long as you need.
-Oh, my God. I'm gonna be on TV!
-Okay, now....
I gotta tell you, being on TV isn't
as glamorous and exciting as you think.
-Really?
-No, it is awesome.
Hey, guys.
Why are you all dressed up?
We're bringing Emma to Ralph Lauren
today to introduce her to everyone.
-Doesn't she look cute?
-She sure does.
Why does she have a pink bow
taped to her head?
Because if one more person says,
"What a cute little boy" ...
...l'm gonna whip them
with a car antenna.
I think she's gonna be
the hit of the office.
Yeah, she's gonna be hotter
than peasant blouses and A-line skirts.
Can I get a blue bow?
Okay. I have looked through
a bunch of career guides...
...photocopied and highlighted
key passages...
...and put them into alphabetical folders,
so you can make an informed decision.
How long was I in there?
Okay, let's start with the A's.
Advertising.
Wait. Advertising, that's a great idea.
Don't you wanna look through the rest?
I don