feel bad for him.
Yeah, well, poor Richard, he....
I can grow a mustache.
This is not our problem. We have
each other. That's all that matters.
But I just keep picturing you rolling
around with him, with your...
...cowboy boots in the air.
Cowboy boots? I've never worn
cowboy boots in my whole life.
Good, good. Play more
because I wanna see how it ends.
-That's not me!
-What?
That's not you! Life is good again!
Ride 'em, cowgirl!
That bastard taped over me!
Is that a problem?
It's just so insulting.
Spring for a new blank tape, doctor!
I can't imagine what he sees in her.
She actually makes me miss
that pill-popping ex-wife of his.
Hello, dear.
-What's going on?
-We were just chitchatting.
-How's your friend?
-A little better.
Do you know who's moving back into
town? Tom and Sue's daughter, Jen.
You remember her, Michael.
She's lovely, well-behaved and single.
-I'm not interested.
-Please, darling, let's be honest.
You can have all the sailor fun
you want with that one.
-But let's be real.
-All right, stop.
All Phoebe has done is try and get you
to like her. Maybe it's not clear...
...but she did her best.
-She's a little different than you are.
-Michael, a pimp spit in her mouth.
So what? If I can get past that,
it shouldn't bother you.
You don't have to like her.
Just accept the fact that I do.
If you can't even be civil
to the woman I love--
-The woman you what?
-Yeah, the woman you what?
The woman I love.
I love you.
Something I shouldn't say for
the first time, in front of my parents...
...and Tom and Sue.
Who are, by the way, the most sinfully
boring people I've ever met in my life.
-I love you too.
-You do?
How great is this?
Wanna get out of here?
-Mom, Dad. Thanks for dinner.
-I had a great time.
It was really top-drawer.
And here's something rich.
Thirteen bathrooms in this place,
I threw up in the coat closet.
Ta-ta!
One more time from the top!
Rachel, please!
That is so inappropriate!
Subtitles by SDI Media Group
Ripped by Bozo
for friendsnet.fr.fmHey, hon? Would you help me
get the plates down?
Hey, here's an idea. Why don't
we use our wedding china today?
No, I think we should save our china
for something really special.
Like if the queen of England
comes over.
Honey, she keeps
canceling on us. Take the hint.
What if something breaks?
They're expensive.
What is the point of having them
if we never use them?
Okay. But if something breaks
and then the queen comes over....
-I will explain it to her.
-Like I'd let you talk to the queen.
The parade is really good this year.
Man, those horses can crap.
Next up is a marching band
from Muskogee, Oklahoma.
Muskogee?
That's like four hours from Tulsa!
Here's the float with the stars
of the popular daytime soap...
...Days of our Lives.
Oh, my God!
Aren't you one of the stars of the
popular daytime soap Days of our Lives?
I forgot! I'm supposed to be there!
I can't believe I forgot! I usually write
stuff like this down on my arm!
Stupid long sleeves!
-What are you gonna do?
-I'll come up with a good reason...
...why I wasn't there.
The producers are gonna be mad.
They sat us down and said:
"Everyone has to be there, 6 a.m. sharp.
That means you, Tribbiani."
Like I was some kind of idiot.
Well, you proved them wrong.
The One With Rachel's Other Sister
Oh, Emma.
This is your first Thanksgiving.
What are you thankful for?
Mommy's boobies?
A lot of people are thankful for those.
Hello? Rachel?
Who is it?
It's your favorite sister.
-Jill?
-Amy!
Hide my rings.
Amy! Happy Thanksgiving.
Do you have a hair straightener?
Hi.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Hair straightener.
-I haven't seen you in, like, a year.
-I know. I know. I've just been crazed.
Well, me too.
I had a baby.
I decorated Dad's office.
Yeah? Well, unless you pushed a desk
out of your vagina, not the same thing.
About that hair straightener,
honey, I really need one.
I'm gonna have dinner
at my