his mind on something...
...more often than not,
he's going to have sex with it.
Well, I mean,
we've gotta do something. Okay?
Nannies like her don't grow on trees.
-Picturing that tree?
-I am, yes.
Where you going, Joe?
For a walk.
You mind if I join you?
Actually, I'd rather be alone. You know,
I really need to organize my thoughts.
Your thoughts?
Plural?
All right, fine.
I only have one thought.
It's about the hot nanny!
I gotta see her!
-I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Joe.
-Now you're saying I can't see her?
You're killing me! She's forbidden fruit!
It's like, like...
...like she's the princess
and I'm the stable boy.
Why are you doing this, huh?
Did Ross tell you not to let me
go over there?
Yes, as a matter of fact, he did.
So I can't let you go.
Interesting. Now there are obstacles.
Hot nanny and me against the world!
This is the stuff great novels
are made of.
-Great novels?
-Fine. Mediocre porn.
-Gavin Mitchell's office.
-Rachel Greene's office.
Give me that phone.
Hello, this is Rachel Greene.
How can I help you?
Okay then.
I'll pass you back to your son.
Hey, Mom.
No, that's just my secretary.
Excuse me, Gavin.
I have a question I need to ask you.
Mom, I'll call you later. Yeah.
-Yes?
-If you like looking at butts so much...
...why don't you just go
look in a mirror?
Thank God you finally said that.
I saw you make a note on your pad
three hours ago.
-Man, I really bug you. Don't I?
-Oh, no. Please...
...I don't care about you
enough to bug me.
In fact, from now on,
I'm going to take the high road...
...and I'm going to be very, very nice
to you, you mama's boy...
...starting right now.
-Hey, Rach.
-Hi.
-Ready for your birthday lunch?
-I am.
But first, Monica,
I would like to introduce you...
...to my very talented colleague
and more importantly...
...my wonderful friend, Gavin Mitchell.
-Pleased to meet you.
-Pleased to meet you.
Are you coming to Rachel's party?
Oh, no, no, no, no. Gavin can't.
He already has plans...
...most likely with his mother.
I don't mind. I'll cancel them. I would
never miss my secretary's birthday.
Why did you invite him?
I can't stand that guy!
-You were being so nice to him.
-I was faking it.
Can't you tell when I'm being fake?
Hey, Mr. Phillips. Nice suit.
Right there.
That was so fake!
I still can't believe you invited Gavin.
He is just the last person
I want to see.
You're welcome for the party.
I'm glad you're having a good time.
I hope he doesn't show up.
Of course he won't, the guy hates me.
-Does he?
-What?
Maybe he keeps bothering you
so much because he likes you.
It's like in first grade
when Skippy Lange would push me...
...because he secretly
had a crush on me.
Monica, you think Skippy liked you?
Honey, all those boys had a bet
to see if he could knock you over.
-She's out. I'm gonna take her home.
-Okay. Thank you.
Bye, sweetheart.
Do you see what all the guys
see in her?
Wouldn't kick her out of bed.
No more vodka for me.
Hey, Rach. So can I sing
"Happy Birthday" to you now?
-Yeah, sure.
-All right.
See you later.
Hey, Rach. Somebody got you shoes.
Give me!
-Wow. Wow. Oh, my God!
-Careful! Careful!
These are my rat babies!
Yeah. We have rat babies now.
You brought rats
to my birthday party?
So this is what a stroke feels like.
Well, I had to bring them.
We killed their mother.
They're our responsibility now.
You know, they require constant care.
You should know that, you're a mother.
Are you comparing my daughter
to a rat?
No. Seven rats.
We should take them home.
We need to feed them.
You're gonna leave my party
to take care of a box of rats?
Well, I'm sorry, Rachel,
but I'm not like you. Okay?
Not everyone can afford help.
Hey, where the hell
are Joey and Molly?
I asked you to watch them.
I'm sorry. I got a little preoccupied.
Look, we have to stop them
before something happens.
Right behind you, big guy.
So you see,