In the border area
between Irukan and Arkanar,
numerous residents saw
a bright point of light near the moon,
which was approaching fast
and turning night into day.
The following night, the light had vanished.
Many believe this phenomenon
to be a sign from God.
They persecute everyone who doubts this
and do not bear in mind
that the imperfection of the eye
can make it impossible for us to understand
the causes of natural phenomena.
In the year 812 of the old Gods
Budach
physician and scholar
HARD TO BE A GOD
Stop! Who's there?
Excuse me, noble lord.
I am the singer Suren.
What do you want?
Would you permit me
to walk along next to your horse?
Why were you hiding, singer?
Because of the Greys. They're everywhere.
No one knows why.
It is said that they are
the new soldiers of Arkanar.
They don't seem to like
people like me very much.
How do you know that I like you, singer?
I might hang you by a strong
Arkanarian rope on the next crag,
your head hanging down
until your tongue bulges out.
So hang me, noble lord, if it pleases you.
What's a singer to somebody like you?
I was only joking, Suren.
You have a great sense of humour,
noble lord!
- Do you know Arkanar well?
- Like the back of my hand.
Then you will show me the way.
- What's wrong?
- There they are again. A group of Greys.
- We shouldn't stop off here.
- I must water my horse.
- Why are you so afraid, singer?
- There are very many of them.
It would be boring to ride for so many miles
without a single brawl.
Hey, you there, nobleman.
I need to see your passport.
From now on, the common man
must guard his tongue, so it won't be cut off.
God didn't give it to him for speaking,
but for licking his master's boots.
Your passport!
- But he shouldn't lick the wrong boots.
- I'm telling you for the last time.
What do you want my passport for?
You can't read it anyway.
I am Rumata of Estoria.
Whoever thwarts me, must die.
Come on, fight, you cowardly rabble.
Hey, singer!
Have you seen the man I arrived with?
Hey, stranger, where are you going?
You have entered Arkanarian territory.
What do you want?
It's nice to see you with my own eyes.
The famous royal guard,
whose bravery the whole world talks about.
- We are honoured, noble lord.
- The whole world talks about our bravery?
Tell people that you have seen us, will you?
Wait. What's your name, stranger?
- You must tell us your name.
- Rumata of Estoria.
The king will be pleased to see you.
We don't have many guests.
May I ask, noble lord,
what brings you to our once-splendid town?
I like spending money.
I see that there is a lot of fun to be had here.
I'm happy to be of service any time.
Reba, captain of the palace guard.
..of Estoria has come to pay his respects
and offer his services to the king.
I think I knew your father. Sit down.
We bow to the king's robe.
Do you like stuffed dog ears?
They've been pickled in kapuki juice.
- Deliciously seasoned.
- Indeed.
Your robe isn't buttoned right.
The ladies must lower their gaze.
What's wrong with you?
Let your breasts bulge out some.
The king would like to share your charms.
To the health of my followers.
- Would you like some fish blood?
- I'd love some.
- It refreshes the senses.
- It refreshes my senses to behold you.
To your beauty.
I don't like fish blood either.
We bow to the king's cloak.
Last night,
some spies from Irukan were arrested.
They have made a confession
in the Tower of Joy
and are now humbly awaiting
their just punishment.
A flying dragon was...
I think your father had the privilege
of putting on my grandfather's right shoe.
- Or was it the left shoe?
- The right one, Your Majesty.
So it was the right one.
A portion of the Soanish merchant fleet
was shipwrecked in the Large Swamp.
- May I look at your sword?
- Shipwrecked! Excellent.
- Wonderful news.
- Can you behead people with this?
- Rejoice with me.
- We bow to the king's shoes.
My