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Говард-утка

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2008Hi, honey, this is your mother.
Listen, I know you're very busy...
with the new job but
please try and call us.
Did you get the birthday
sweater we sent?
We'll be home all weekend.
Bye.
Howard, Jim here. We still set
for racquet ball on Saturday.
Give me a shout,
Buddy, bye-bye.
Hi, it's Wendy. I had this really
intense dream last night, Howie.
I was running my fingers through
your feathers, and all...
of a sudden well, you better come
over tonight and I'll show you...
what really happened next.
Ciao for now, Howie.
Hey, Ricky's back with you again for
lots more Dance Frenzy excitement.
Here's couple number three
our lovely Latin dance team...
from Wedford Falls, Charles is a
Machinist First Class in the Navy...
and his darling wife,
Madge, is a blackjack dealer.
Just a super jock dance.
Charles and Madge.
Come on,
let's hear for them, folks.
What's the matter, George?
Jock itch again?
I've got just the thing.
Here. Why not take
a shot of New Shorts Blaster?
It's guaranteed to wipe out
feather fungus in even...
- the most active crotches.
- Shorts Blaster.
In addiction, you've won a new car.
But that's not all.
Fred, I love you so much.
- It hurts like hell.
- He's dead.
$79,95?
Forget it!
$49,99?
No way.
I'm crazy and
my prices are insane!
Who did they
interview this month?
My little airbrush beauty.
What?
No, it's a quake!
I can't get up!
What's going on here?
Casey, did you hear something?
I'm such a lucky girl
I'm in love
The Cosmos.
Countless worlds upon worlds.
Worlds without end.
In these galaxies
every possible reality exits.
And what is reality on any one
world is mere fantasy on all others.
Here, all is real
and all is illusion.
What is, what was and what
will be start here with the words.
In the beginning
there was...
"Howard the Duck".
Boy!
I'm a dead duck.
Hey, come on.
No!
Bender, go on in, Frankenweed.
We finally found you a date.
What is this?
That costume doesn't fool me.
No kids allowed.
- Come on, Kid.
- Wait a minute, that's my date.
I said out of the way!
No, wait!
You little creep!
Get away from my cart,
you filthy degenerated.
- Christ, it touched me!
- What the hell is it?
I wasn't trying anything!
Honest!
Step on him!
Up, up and away!
Are you ready
for an incredible story?
- Waste it, man, waste it!
- No!
Talk about a rotten day?
- Just saw your show.
- Great, thanks.
- Beverly, we love your music.
- Goodbye now.
Could I have your
autograph on my shirt?
Me too.
On my shorts?
Real charming.
Just go away, okay?
We're talking to you,
big Rock Star!
- Don't do anything!
- Don't go snot nose on us.
- We're your biggest fans.
- Let me go!
Help somebody, help!
Help!
Come here, snot nose!
That's it.
No more Mister Nice Duck!
Let the female creature go.
Every duck's got his limit, and you
scum have pushed me over the line.
Jimmy,
do you like see what I see?
- A talking duck?
- Yeah. That's it.
I've been doing too much toot.
Fly away!
No one laughs at
a master of Quack-Foo!
Jimmy, you okay?
Get off me!
You, creep, get out of here!
You're breaking my fingers!
Now, you and baby face
are gonna beat it, right, Mr. Zitz?
Before I get really mad!
Come on!
Let's get out of here!
This is obviously no place for
an intelligent, sensitive duck.
This is unreal.
I mean, it can't be.
- Thanks.
- You're not really a duck?
You know, this is beginning to
seriously undermine my self-esteem.
I'm sorry, I guess I should thank
you for chasing those guys off.
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, sure. Terrific.
I just have one giant question.
Where am I?
The lights up there
are Ninth Street and...
the bus stops
at the corner of Powell.
No, no, no, no.
I'm asking, what is this place?
- Cleveland?
- Cleveland?
That's a perfect weird name
for this planet.
Planet?
No, no, that's a city.
The planet's
You don't know the planet?
The planet's called Earth,
I think.
And I'm obviously
Говард-утка

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