from Dave.
You wanna play?
No!
Go easy on him, taco boy.
This day's been
bad enough already.
Oh! I think I see
what's going on.
You guys have been having
some problems at school?
Uh, no. Not really.
Unless you consider
getting your head
dumped into a public
toilet a problem.
(LAUGHING) Ouch!
Swirlies are the worst.
At least that's
what I've heard.
Because there's no way
that I could possibly know
that on a personal level.
Toby, what was school
like for you?
Toby? Toby?
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
(GASPING)
(LAUGHING NERVOUSLY)
Ow! Ow!
(EXCLAIMING)
(SCREAMS)
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
(GASPS)
THEODORE: Toby? Toby!
What?
What was school like for me?
Uh, in a word, awesome.
But, you know,
that's 'cause I was,
like, extremely popular.
Is that why you still live
with your grandma?
And refer to yourself
as "the Tobester"?
And go "pyu-pyu-pyu" all day?
(CHUCKLING SARCASTICALLY)
Bedtime!
(ALARM CLOCK BUZZING)
(SLEEPILY) Alvin?
Alvin, wake up and
turn off the alarm!
Alvin!
Alvin, I'm not kidding!
I'm not kidding, buddy.
Turn it off!
Guys! Guys...
(BUZZING CONTINUES)
Boys, this isn't funny.
ALVIN: (MUFFLED)
Hello. Humane Society?
Yes. I need help.
A man is after us.
He wants to take us
to a terrible place.
School!
TOBY: Out!
Aw, have a heart, huh?
Have a heart?
Dave wants you
to go to school,
so you're going.
Yeah, well, don't worry about
picking us up at 3:00, Toby.
We'll get a ride.
In a hearse!
(CHUCKLING)
Guys, guys, come on.
Look, trust me.
The second day is never
as bad as the first.
(CHIPMUNKS EXCLAIMING)
Glasses! Glasses!
You wouldn't hit a guy
with glasses, would you?
BOY 1: You're out, man!
BOY 2: Ha!
Right in the pancreas.
(PANTING)
(BOTH EXCLAIMING IN PAIN)
Call the nurse.
COACH: Out! Out! You're out.
SIMON: Come on, Alvin!
Remember your five D's!
Dodge, duck, dip,
dive and dodge!
COACH: Move!
You're next, fur ball.
You talking to me?
You talking to me?
I'm the only one here,
so you must be talking to me.
(BOYS LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING) Yeah! Got him!
BOY: Did you see that?
Oh! Boo-yah!
Unbelievable.
He caught it.
You're out, man.
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
And the fat lady,
she's a-singing.
Dude's got hands.
I think they're paws,
actually.
Whatever.
We can definitely
use him on the team.
Hey, fur ball!
How would you like
a spot on the football team?
Football?
(SPEAKS FRENCH)
I gotta say, you're good.
I'm gonna let you hang out
with us at lunch.
That is, if you wanna
be on the team.
Hmm. Interesting proposition.
SIMON: Alvin?
Let me get back
to you on that.
This is a one-time offer.
Don't take too long
to think it over.
Right! Like I would ditch
my brothers just to become
the first chipmunk ever
to play on an actual
varsity football team.
(LAUGHING) Fat chance!
ALVIN: The stadium
is pandemonium!
It's fourth and goal.
It's up! It's up!
And he catches it!
The crowd goes crazy!
(IMITATING CROWD ROARING)
RYAN: Psst! Hey!
Me?
ALVIN: Alvin! Alvin!
Alvin! Alvin!
Alvin, I think the
super-cool jock table
is paging you.
Why would I go over there?
Like I really need to worry
about being popular.
Hello? Talking chipmunk? Huh?
World-famous rock star?
Guy with his own plush doll?
Guys, I'm on pajamas!
Not to toot my
own horn, but...
(IMITATING HORN TOOTING)
Come on. It's laughable.
Just go, Alvin.
Really? You mean it?
Yeah.
Thanks! I'll be right back!
What up, dudes?
RYAN: What's up, little man?
XANDER: Welcome
to the cool table.
Yeah! Bring it.
BOY: Yeah!
Pound the paw.
(ALVIN GRUNTING)
I want it!
I got it! I got it! I...
Don't got it.
I think he's cute.
Me, too.
Toss. And he's up!
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
Thank you.
Hey, Alvin.
Call me.
Bernie, I'm telling you,
the Chipmunks are old news.
I got the next big thing.
Singing female chipmunks.
(PHONE LINE DISCONNECTS)
Hello? Bernie? Hello?
God! What part of "singing
female chipmunks"
don't these people...
Girls, we're