..wow.
I felt like I was
going to explode!
Kaboom!
Oh, Scotty!
( moaning )
Mmm, God.
Ooh, you're so...
# Hey, wait a minute #
# Isn't that my Lynette? #
# With that stiff Leroy
in his red Corvette? #
( men laughing )
( barking )
Worms, you horny mutt,
get over here.
Come on!
Come on, boy.
Come here.
Good boy, you little slut.
Good boy.
That's a good boy.
( yelping )
( screams )
Get off the towel!
Give me my top!
Come on, dog, give it to me.
Dang it.
Good boy. Good boy, Worms.
Good boy, Worms.
Here's your treat.
Here's your reward.
Hey, creep,
get your fleabag off the beach.
Yeah, and give me back
my top, dog meat.
Sure thing, lover girl.
I'll even help you put it on.
I'll tie the straps.
- Scotty, help!
- Scotty!
Quick, you guys!
Excuse me. You're gonna
have to move on down the beach.
- This area's quarantined.
- Who says so?
I'm Scotty Palmer, pal.
I'm head of the geek patrol.
Now you got a license
to be geeking on this part of the beach?
Look, this is our beach.
We live here.
We don't mind sharing with you.
Just don't upset the ladies, okay?
Tell me, dipshit,
who's gonna stop me?
( laughing )
My friend Rag here,
he's multilingual.
He's flipping you off
in 48 languages.
I hope you know karate.
That's one dead mother.
Stop! That thing hurts!
( screams )
Oh my God.
You guys got balls.
I can't believe you knocked
down the Gonads' bikes.
What, you're saying
the Gonads are assholes?
I can't believe you guys!
Your ass is grass, smiley!
Yeah, my ass
is grass, huh?
Come on, let's go!
Later, dudes.
Now have I ever steered you wrong?
I'm telling you.
Kimber has got the hots for you.
He's so gross. No way.
I don't know.
I think he's kind of cute.
Come on, buddy.
You gotta make your move.
She's stuck up, dude.
She thinks I'm a scuzz.
Forget it.
He's a scuzz, Kristi, no way.
You're a hero now, man.
You saved her.
Be Scottifitous, buddy.
- Listen, girls...
- He's such a scuzz.
...we got a serious
morale problem.
You know, my brave buddy Rag, he's
not feeling very good about himself.
- He's just being realistic, Scott.
- Oh, be realistic, Kimber.
Fuck your friend, okay?
( girls squealing )
You are so cute!
I love your bod.
Did you see that?
Those two great-looking girls
with that ugly guy?
This could be
my kind of beach.
Rounder, did I tell you,
man, huh?
Come on, the most beautiful girls
in the world are right here.
When you're right, you're right.
Am I right?
I don't know how I let you
perverts talk me into this.
Ashman, come on,
what kind of attitude is that?
You're not wussing out
on us, are you?
No, Hunter, it's just all these nubiles
make me feel like an old fucker.
- You are an old fucker.
- So are you. So am I. So what?
Look, we spent years getting our
businesses to run the way we want 'em
so we could come and do this.
This is the perfect time to do this.
Yeah, well, I've seen more
than one old bull blow out his balls
and his brains
at the same time.
That's definitely giving it
your best shot.
- ( imitates bull mooing )
- ( imitates gunshot )
Let's go!
( tires squealing )
Gentlemen, I know
you'll love this place.
We call this our divorcee special.
Hey, baby, hey hey.
Good thing our ex-wives
didn't get here first.
Four bedrooms--
one with a waterbed
and three
with extra firm mattresses.
That's a real comfort to me,
suffering as I do
from a herniated lower lumbar.
Really?
How'd that happen?
What's Ash suffering from?
- A bent wanger.
- Bent wanger? Bummer.
Well, dip my skinny.
Is this great?
I can't wait to see Barnes'
and the guys from the club's faces
when they see this.
Hey, Hunter, we agreed, man--
no business cronies.
This thing's strictly for pleasure.
You're right.
- We'll take it.
- Great.
Let's go sign the lease.
Party party party party!
# When I'm on the beach #
# Where I belong, yeah! #
( vocalizes )
Hunter:
Nuh-uh-uh. That one.
With the tongue?
Trust