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Главная / Сайнфельд - Сезоны 01-09

Сайнфельд - Сезоны 01-09

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to hell.
And if you think I'm going to hell,
you should care that I'm going to hell,
even though I am not.
You stole my Jesus fish, didn't you?
Yeah, that's right!
Oh, my liver!
Why did I drink all those years?
Why did I look for love in a bottle?
Mr. Kramer? You're up.
Wait a minute.
- What?
You are doing gonorrhea, aren't you?
Well, we'll see.
Student #2: So, what seems to be
bothering you today, Mr. Kramer?
Well, I guess it started
about twenty years ago
when I got back from Viet Nam,
and this was the only friend I had left.
Hey! That's my cirrhosis! He's stealing my cirrhosis!
You wanna be sick?
I'll make you sick.
Student #2: Cirrhosis of the liver and--
PCP addiction?
Let me see if I understand this.
You're concerned that he
isn't concerned that you're going to hell.
And you feel that she's too bossy.
Yeah, that's right.
Well, oftentimes in cases of
inter-faith marriages, couples have difficulty--
Woah, woah, woah!
No one's getting married here.
You aren't?
No.
Oh.
We're just, you know,
having a good time.
Oh.
Well, then it's simple.
You're both going to hell.
No way.
This is bogus, man!
Well, thank you, Father.
Oh, did you hear the one
about the new guy in hell
who's talkng to the devil
by the coffee machine?
I'm really not in the mood.
I'm going to hell.
Oh, lighten up.
It'll only feel like an eternity.
You know, Jerry, there's this thing
that I haven't told you about.
See, there was this tractor and--
Oh boy, this is really difficult.
Sophie, it's me. ,
I know about the tractor story
and I'm fine with it.
How could you know?
It's not important.
What's important is, I'm not gonna
let a little thing like that
ruin what could be a very long-term
and meaningful relationship.
... I didn't say that, no.
You gave me gonorrhea,
you didn't even tell me!
Well, I'm sorry.
I gave you gonorrhea because
I thought you'd have fun with it.
Hey, hey!
I'm with someone.
Oh.
Hello.
No, I understand.
This could be a tough thing to deal with.
The important thing is that
you have a partner who's supportive.
You know?
She's right.
Unfortunately,
I didn't have a partner.
I got gonorrhea from a tractor.
You got gonorrhea from a tractor?
And you call that the tractor story?
You can't get it from that.
But I did.
My boyfriend said I got gonorrhea
from riding the tractor in my bathing suit.
Alright, that's it for me.
You've been great.
Goodnight everybody.
Would you mind helping me out
with some of this stuff?
You seem like you've got
a pretty good handle on it.
No! I don't!
Don't you even care?
This is your company!
It's your name
on the outside of the building!
Speaking of which--
the 'R' fell off
and all it says now is K-uger!
K-Uger, that sounds like
one of those old-time car horns, huh?
K-Uger! K-Uger!
You are too much, Mr. Kruger!
Too much!
Thank you George, you've been great.
That's it for me.
Oh no, you're not going out
on a high note with me, Mr. Kruger!
It's K-Uger!
No! No!
Goodnight everybody!I'm doing a set tonight,
you hangin' out?
Yeah, yeah.
- Alright.
I don't believe this.
I read somewhere that this Brentano's
is the place to meet girls in New York.
First it was the health club,
then the supermarket, now the bookstore.
They could put it anywhere they want,
no one's meetin' anybody.
Jerry, look at all these pagodas, huh?
I gotta get over to Hong Kong
before it all goes back to China...
You better hurry.
I'm gonna hit the head.
Oh, boy, look at this.
Hong Kong's outlawed the rickshaw.
See, I always thought
those would be perfect for New York.
Yes, the city needs more
slow-moving wicker vehicles.
Hmm, Elaine's been to Hong Kong.
I should give her a call.
She's at that annual Peterman party tonight.
You know, the one she danced at last year?
No, that wasn't dancing.
Hey, there's Leo.
Oh? Who's Leo?
Uncle Leo.
Oh, yeah. Right. Uncle, Leo.
Forgot his first name...
Did I just see
Сайнфельд - Сезоны 01-09 Сайнфельд - Сезоны 01-09

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