've had some lonely nights
"And I'll admit I crled sometimes
"Cause you were out of my Ilfe
"But then you called my name
"And you came back agaln
"I feel so Insplred
"Klsslng your Ilps of flre
"Llttle boy sweet, Ilttle boy sweet
"Sweet Ilttle boy of mlne
"Come a Ilttle closer"
Clark.
You're doing 80 miles an hour!
Doesrt seem like it.
Slow down!
I don't know why.
We're making good time.
"Love for sale
"Appetizing, yummy love..."
CATHERINE: They're here! Eddie, come on!
I can't believe it!
Eddie, you look terrific.
Come and meet your second cousins!
Look how they've grown!
You have lost weight, Catherine!
EDDIE: She's added a few more mouths
to the litter.
CATHERINE: Rusty and Audrey,
cousins Vicki and Dale.
Hi.
And this is Eddie Junior and Junior.
The little one hanging
on my skirt is Daisy-Mabel.
How old are you, little one?
She was born without a tongue, Clark.
But, don't worry about her. She whistles
like a bird and eats like a horse.
Take your little guests out back
and show them your worm farm.
CATHERINE: Ellen, come in the house.
I've got so much to tell you.
EDDIE: Look at that car!
That's the Family Truckster.
Boy, she's a beaut!
I like those green walls.
We had some trouble in St. Louis.
You're looking really...
...fit.
This is the old homestead.
Yeah, I don't know for how long, though.
The bank's been after me
like flies on a rib roast.
I know the feeling.
Fuck it!
I bet you could use a cool one?
Now you're talking.
VICKl: I'm going steady.
And I French kiss.
So? Everyone does that.
Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best.
Want a worm?
No, thanks.
Do you have Pac-Man?
No.
Space Invaders?
No.
Do you have Asteroids?
No, but my dad does.
He can't even sit on the toilet some days.
What do you do here, Dale?
Well, I have a stack
of nudie books this high.
She's beautiful!
Would you sell me any of them?
Shit, no! I cherish these things!
I use them a lot!
How do you use a magazine?
I was getting to that.
A guy taught me something really neat,
last year.
Did you ever bop your baloney?
I guess we're 11, aren't we?
No, we're 12 with Aunt Edna.
Aunt Edna? Is she still alive?
You bet!
I can't wait to see the look on Clark's face
when he hears that.
She came to help
when Eddie ruptured his spleen...
...and she's been here ever since.
She wanted to go back
to Phoenix last year...
...but Eddie wouldn't let her.
Without her Social Security,
we'd never be able to live like this.
Gee, Cath...
It looks like you've really got
your hands full.
It's not so bad!
Eddie says after the baby comes,
I can quit one of my night jobs.
How do you like yours, Clark?
Medium-rare, a little pink inside.
No, your bun! Light or dark?
Either way, it doesn't matter.
Vicki, can I help you with that Kool-Aid?
Please?
EDDIE: Mm mmm!
EDDIE: I don't know why they call this
"Hamburger Helper!"
It does just fine by itself.
I like it better than Tuna Helper,
don't you, Clark?
You're the gourmet, Ed.
No meat in this?
You get plenty of meat at home.
Be polite. Have some ketchup.
Real tomato ketchup, Eddie?
Nothing but the best!
Aunt Edna!
EDDIE: Helper's getting cold.
Is that your Aunt Edna?
ELLEN: Aunt Edna! After all these years!
You're looking so good!
CLARK: Hi, Edna! Nice to see you again!
You remember Clark, don't you?
You were the ones who sent me
the fruitcake for Christmas.
It made me so sick!
I'm sorry. We thought
you enjoyed fruitcake.
Do you enjoy throwing up
every five minutes, Claude?
- Clark.
- I thought so.
Well, am I going to eat or starve to death?
Catherine!
Did you tell Clark and Ellen the good news?
No. I was just about to.
What's the good news?
You're driving me to Phoenix!
"Junior Pig Competition?"
You won this for racing a pig?
Yeah. First Place.
AUDREY: Does anyone know about it?
Everyone knows.
Vicki, don't be offended, but being
a farmer is not too cool, you know.
Oh, yeah?
How cool...
...is this?
I