old wives' tale, Clark!
I'm telling.
See, I told you! I warned you!
If you wrecked the pants,
you'll pay for them!
Yeah, I'll pay for 'em.
Freeze!
Don't shoot!
Hands behind your heads!
Spread your legs!
Move up against the wall!
You two, over there!
It's just a BB-gun!
You are all under arrest.
You have the right to remain silent.
Watch your hands, mister!
How many are there?
A lot of them?
Whatever they want...
We'll pay 'em! We'll pay 'em!
Tell me, what is going on?
Everything's under control, sir.
They are terrorists!
Where?
Them?
He treated me like a dog!
He humiliated me!
What did he do with your dog?
He kidnapped me, Mr. Wally,
but I gotta tell you...
...I had a great time on your rides.
It was the most fantastic
experience I've ever had!
I like the part where you go
really way up high...
I'm glad you liked it.
Now, what's happening?
That is Roy Walley, honey!
I'm Russ Lasky. I met you
at the summer picnic last year.
I don't remember.
They kidnapped one of my men.
I was the one who got sick.
Anyway Mr. Wally,
I went on all the rides...
...I didn't get sick this time.
Normally I get sick on all your rides...
Quiet!
Mr. Walley... Roy?
I think I can make
some sense out of this.
Well, someone had better explain!
Or there will be a lot
of explaining to do!
I'm Clark W. Griswold.
This is my wife, Ellen.
Hi. We're big fans of yours.
We watch your show all the time.
These are my children, Audrey and Rusty.
Nice family.
We're from Chicago, Roy.
"The Windy City."
I've been there many times.
We just spent two weeks
of living hell, driving out here.
We lost a dear member
of the family on the way.
But, the important thing,
Roy, is that...
...we could have gone anywhere
we wanted to this summer.
Anywhere in the world.
But when I asked my kids...
Kids, remember when I asked you
where you wanted to go on vacation?
What did you say?
Hawaii?
Shut up, Russ.
Audrey, you remember?
Walley World, Dad?
"Walley World, Dad! "
Roy Walley World.
Do you have any children, Mr. Walley?
Are you kidding? I have seven.
I thought so.
Seven, did you hear that, honey?
You look so young!
Did you ever drive them across country?
I took the whole clan
to Florida one year.
The worst two weeks
I ever had in my life.
The smell from the backseat
was too unbearable.
I know that smell.
Imagine how your kids would
have felt if Florida had been closed.
They don't close Florida.
I know they don't close
the state of Florida.
When we got here,
to Roy Walley World...
...and it was closed down...
If you had seen the look
on my kids faces.
I guess I went a little haywire.
You went a lot haywire,
if you ask me!
I'm very sorry, sir.
I'm sorry to all these people.
I didn't mean any harm.
I want you to ask yourself one thing.
If you were me...
...wouldn't you have done
the same thing for your children?
No.
Mr. Walley, do you want me to take
them downtown and book them?
No... no.
Forget it, officer.
I'm not going to press any charges.
What did I tell ya?
Did I say trust me?[Pop song Holiday Road
by Lindsey Buckingham plays, background]
"I found out long ago
"It's a long way down a Holiday Road"
"Jack be nimble, Jack be quick
"Going to take a ride
to the West Coast, kids
"Holiday Road!
"Holiday Road!
"Holiday Road!
"Holiday Road!
"I found out long ago
"It's a long way down a Holiday Road
"Holiday Road!
"Holiday Road!
"Holiday Road!"
[Dog barking in distance]
Clark Griswold. I'm trading
my wife's old car in.
[Clark chuckles]
CLARK: Say good-bye
to the old gas-guzzler, Russ!
It's pretty exciting, isn't it, Rusty?
What is?
Picking up the new car!
You can't wait, can you?
Hi there, Ed!
ED: Good to see you, Mr. Griswold!
ED: How're you doing? Ruben, right?
RUSTY: Rusty.
Look at him. He can't wait.
So, did you bring your trade-in?