you read
the play. He's a little high-strung.
JACKIE: We love his play.
PATRICK: Love it!
KREPLICH:
What's he looking for?
There's nobody here but us.
Travalian! Here.
I'm sorry l'm a little late.
How late am I?
- Two hours and 10 minutes.
- Oh, my God.
- I'm Ivan Travalian.
- Hi, how are you?
- Hi.
- Who are you guys?
"Who are you guys?" Kidding.
The Dickers.
- He's Patrick.
- He's Jackie.
The Dickers, Ivan.
You have the Dickers,
you have greatness.
There is no better accountant
than Jackie.
- Am I right?
- He's the accountant. I'm the lawyer.
See what you got?
One accountant, one lawyer.
Born for business greatness.
- We're backing you with 1.3 million.
- Our own money.
That much? It costs that much?
That's cheap. That's because
Arnold Kreplich is a superb producer.
- Mr. Broadway.
- Come on, you're embarrassing me.
You've attracted a star
in Alice Detroit for the lead.
- Money in the bank.
- We're probably talking Tonys.
Ivan and I are gonna meet her,
have a drink, clean up a few things.
- I thought she was all set.
- Trouble?
- Are you kidding?
- You guys ought to know...
...my wife, Gloria...
...is having an affair
with an accountant...
...named Larry Kotzwinkle.
- Do we know him?
We know lzzy Kotzwinkle, but he's
kind of old. How old is Larry?
Forties. Late 40's.
Oh, God, no.
Izzy must be 80 by now.
Why do you want to bring
that up at a business lunch?
I'm so depressed.
Playwright.
I see it as a historic event.
Two major talents meeting for
the first time, like Macy and Gimbel.
TRAVALIAN:
What are you saying?
- Macy and Gimbel. Come on!
- Arnold, don't talk crazy.
I got a headache.
Put your tie on. We gotta get going.
I'm going in open-collar.
More Hollywood.
We're doing theater.
Have your tie on!
[DOOR KNOCKING]
What?
Miss Knoph, is that you?
Sorry, Mr. Kreplich.
Did I knock too softly again?
If you're gonna knock, knock!
- I know, I know. I'm sorry.
- Well, what is it?
Oh, yes! Sorry. There's a Mr. Handke
here to interview you...
...from Voice of Broadway.
That's a program...
...broadcast all over Europe from
Berlin for Armed Forces Radio.
Ms. Knoph, we are going to The Plaza
to see Ms. Alice Detroit.
He said you asked him to come.
- Ms. Knoph.
- I'm sorry.
Get rid of him.
Okay, Travalian, let's go.
There's one thing I forgot to tell
you about the meeting.
It's nothing to get upset about...
...but there's one detail
I forgot to work out.
You're hugging me, Arnold. Why?
Listen.
- I lied.
- What?
Alice Detroit has not agreed
to do the play.
What?
You told me she was signed
to do this play.
You told the Post,
you told the Times. I read it.
I did it for the good of the play.
You can convince her!
You mean to tell me that you lied to me,
to everybody...
...told them we had this superstar...
...and we didn't?
Now you want me to go
to the Palm Court and conv...
- Where are you going?
- I'm gonna see my lawyer.
- She's nearly convinced.
- You locked the door.
- It's a piece of cake.
- Give me the key to the door.
You threw the key out the window.
Her lawyer says
she's 90 percent convinced!
I don't need 90 percent, Arnold.
I need 100 percent.
It's a whole person I need.
See, it's a demanding part.
This is crazy. This is 51 stories.
- Ivan.
- You could kill somebody.
All you've gotta do is chat with her.
Be yourself. Be charming, be debonair
and you'll convince her.
My wife left.
You want me to be charming?
You wanna feed your orphanage?
If you don't convince Alice...
...the Dickers will not give us the
1.3 million, under no circumstances!
No ifs, no ands, no buts, no show!
Now, what do you wanna do?
Ms. Detroit? Sorry we're late.
- Ivan Travalian.
- Oh, l'm so pleased.
I am so thrilled.
I've read everything you've written.
- This is Ivan Travalian.
- Oh, no.
- I'm Arnold Kreplich, the producer.
- I blew it already, l'm sorry.
- I should have known that.
TRAVALIAN: I don't