She drank that milk and said :
'I was born in a village.
'For the milk to stay fresh,
we put a frog in it.'
Then, some time passed.
Once, in summer,
I was at my dacha
and the fridge kicked off,
and I remembered.
I found some toad and put it
into the milk-can.
Maybe the milk did
stay fresh,
but the frog had shit into it
all the way through!
All I saw were the frog's
horrified eyes and loads of shit!
And I thought:
'What a bitch!'
How could I believe a hooker?
Hi there.
What would you like?
Small breasts,
Her hair... never mind.
- Small breasts....
- Nicely put.
Though breasts
don't matter either.
- How much today?
- 900 rubles, today and tomorrow.
We've stable prices.
On other corners they would
charge you one thou and up.
- I've only 650.
- 600 is for a blow job.
- No, I want it normal.
- A blow job is normal!
Everyone is happy
with our blow jobs here.
- I've 750.
- You don't have a car?
The girls can work in
the parlor, or in a car.
In the parlor it will be 1,500,
with a discount.
- And in the car?
- But you don't have a car.
Hi. Going home?
Why don't you talk?
I don't talk to strangers.
Very well then.
We don't have to talk.
Hey, bug off,
you smell of fish.
Hey, I've a friend,
he rents an apartment.
He's a cool guy.
We can buy you smthn to drink.
I've 750 rubles.
I smell of fish - so what?
- You must be used to this.
- Leave me alone! I'm married.
You liar!
You are a hooker!
Hey, wait.
You gotta give no less than a
half to the pimp, right?
I got 750, that is
more than a half.
They charge 1500 in the parlor:
I don't think they are paying
you extra for working there.
So, it's 900 and not 1500, that
Would have to be divided by two.
That means you get 450
from a client, tops.
And I'm offering you
1,5 times as much!
All right, you can rest.
We will meet in the afternoon.
In the afternoon I won't
smell of fish, I promise.
Jesus! I'm so sick of you!
Valery!
Take his money.
Seal!
Oh, it's you.
I'm staying up here,
all bored.
And you are wandering the streets.
Your face covered with blood.
You live one hell
of an interesting life, Seal.
You smell of fish.
What's with your face?
She said to me:
'I'll tell you when you should
stop. I'll say ''Stop it, Seal'''
But then she says: 'go on.'
Pretty cute, isn't it?
Lyuba told me
she's getting married.
What do you think
she wanted from me?
If you keep on thinking about what
they want, you'll never get it up.
With women, you should never
offer them anything specific.
Nor should you expect them to
offer anything specific to you.
I don't get you.
I myself realized this
not long ago.
This is the way I see it - When
she says 'I'll tell you when to stop'
that means she wants me
to hold back.
I restrain myself - and all of the
sudden she wants me to go at it.
But I can't- because
I'm restraining myself!
That's why I have no erection.
Erection or no erection -
they are never happy.
Mine is up all the time, so I
get crap from Alla because of it.
Who is that? There is such a thing
as telephone, you blokes!
- It's the landlord.
- Why so early?
Trying to catch me offguard.
Hi, what a big surprise.
Playing the Conservatory today?
Or is it the crematorium again?
I was loading crates with
shrimps all night long.
You advised me to become
a coaler. Great advice.
Only there is no coal to be found
around here, tons of shrimp though.
So, in a week I'll pay you
a 2 months' rent, all right?
These sharks have no shame.
Won't give me a break.
- I should find a better appartment.
- What should I do?
- You enlist.
- What?
You go to the enlistment office.
They got some hot nurses there!
Very experienced, sex machines!
You get kick-ass sex real cheap -
like a hundred rubles or two.
It's like you don't walk out,
they take you out on a stretcher.
Were you taken out on a stretcher?
No, but this one dude from our
team was. He came to in the car.
He was still high as a