Simon.
Aw! The name's Seville. Alvin Seville.
Ah...
Somebody's gonna have to
knock those guys down to size.
Well, that should be pretty easy.
I mean, they're only 8 inches tall.
I had 15 cars.
I mean, that's, like, five more
cars than anybody really needs.
I had seven maids. I had
courtside seats to the Lakers.
Even my maids had courtside
seats to the Lakers.
And now look at me.
Look at me!
Alvin and the Chipmunks!
I lost everything.
Except for my dignity. They
can't take that away from me.
And it's all because of them.
Oh, hey. Breakfast.
Now I run around
hoping and praying
that I can find other animals
that can sing or dance. I mean...
Wait a second.
You don't sing, do you?
Hey! Hey!
That's my muffin!
Give me my muffin,
you dirty rat!
I will get you, Chipmunks.
Whoa!
Girls,
we gotta get out of here.
I can't see.
Ow! Not on my nose!
That's my tail!
Sorry.
Move your butt!
Okay.
Who's squishing me?
We made it.
Jett Records.
Whoo!
Oh, my gosh. That's him.
Lan Hawke. Uh, Mr. Hawke?
That voice. I can't
get it out of my head.
Hello? Mr. Hawke!
That's not in my head.
That's really happening.
What do you want? We want
to introduce ourselves.
That's right. I'm Brittany,
and this is my sister Eleanor.
Hello, sir. Such a pleasure to meet you.
And I'm their
sister Jeanette.
Although I feel more like
an Olivia, or sometimes a...
Anyway,
we're the Chipettes.
And, well, we would just be so
honored to have you represent us.
You made Alvin and the Chipmunks
stars. We wanna be stars, too.
Yeah. And hang out with the Chipmunks.
Okay, now, listen, before we get
all girlie and giggly about this,
just tell me one thing.
You can sing, right?
No, no, wait. Hang on.
Not here. Um...
Why don't we take this meeting
upstairs in my penthouse office?
Sure!
This is so exciting.
We're really on our way now.
Oh, my gosh. Guys, can you believe
it? My first penthouse office!
Wow!
Oh, boy!
Oh, my.
The Hollywood sign.
Thought you might
like the view.
So, ladies, tell me a little
something about yourselves.
Well, we grew up in a small
town, population 300, and...
Yeah? Really?
That's fascinating. Great.
All right, impress me.
One, two, three.
Girls, girls, girls, girls.
Guess who just became the number one
Chipette fan in the whole dang world?
Lan Hawke, that's who.
Yay! Nice! Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh!
So when can we
meet the Chipmunks?
That's an excellent question.
And the excellent answer is,
I don't really represent Alvin
and the Chipmunks anymore.
Oh, no!
What happened?
Oh, classic tale.
Sweet and innocent when I met
them, and they had nothing.
And then I work my butt off
to make them rock stars,
and they changed.
Turned on me
like bad cheese.
No!
Oh, that's terrible.
I know! I mean, I treated Alvin
like he was my own son, you know?
And then he just
goes and spits on me.
Literally. He filled his chipmunk
cheeks with saliva and just had at it.
And don't even get me
started about Simon.
But not Theodore, right?
It's the cuddly ones
you have to watch out for.
Oh. But what are we
talking about them for?
Come on! They're over.
Tired. Novelty act.
Chipmunks who can sing.
But girl chipmunks
who can sing?
Fasten your seatbelts!
Yippee!
Yay!
So, I'm on Jay-Z's yacht, right?
And I say, "Jay, where's Beyonce?"
And he says, "She's holding a plate
full of Cheese Balls. Turn around."
And guess what?
She was!
P.S., Dave left me in charge.
Staying up till 10:00
every night. Oh, yeah!
Hey, girls,
look what I can do.
Aw!
You are Theodore-able.
Thank you.
You're so cute.
Oops! Oh!
I am so sorry.
It's cool. No harm done.
Not yet.
Girls? Please?
Private conference.
Thank you.
Listen up, rock stars.
If you talk to those
girls again, you're dead.
If you look at those
girls again, you're dead.
If you even think
about those girls...
Are you thinking about them?
Well, I am now!
That's it. You're dead!
Run!