fightin' men...
/...of the 303.
/Give us this day...
/...our daily bread...
/...and leopard skin...
/...for our head.
/That we may fight...
Coffee?
Yes, please.
Good. Good. Good. Looking good.
Bring it all back home.
Lassie barks twice, and it's
time to take out the garbage.
Hell of a show, Stan.
Hell of a job.
It's just producing. That's what it is.
You know, there's no
Academy Award for producing.
- You're kidding.
- There's no Academy Award for producing.
Where do movies come from if
nobody produces them, Connie?
They come from people like you.
Well, you know. You just got to
take the bitter with the better.
Job's almost done.
Knock on wood.
We did a good job.
That's our reward.
You know, you can't save the world.
All you can do is try.
Ain't that the truth?
And, as we said, the president...
...thrust of the Albanian
episode to put him over the top.
Yes. You could say that, Shirley,
but it's just simply just not true.
What would be true, then?
Well, you said it yourself
earlier, if I may rephrase...
...that the success of the
president in the polls...
- As of today, 89% favorable.
- 89% favorable...
...is based not on the events,
which of course we cannot control...
...but on the spin
given to those events.
What's the lesson here, Connie?
Never give up. Never give up.
You're right. You're right.
The show must go on.
Proud traditions.
I am prouder of this than
anything I ever did in my life.
You should be, Stan.
I want to thank you, Connie.
I want to thank you.
- You gave me a good opportunity.
- Thank you. Thank you.
And as we said, the president,
a surefire winner...
...and the campaign, many
said, that put him there.
Another great race today, Johnny.
Who are you going to ride in the Stakes?
Eddie, like my daddy
always used to say...
The message is irrelevant.
The main element here
we have to deal with...
...is the fact that fear is what's
driving a lot of people. Ok?
Yes. Commercials. Commercials.
Commercials. Commercials.
The president is a product.
Yes, the president is a product.
He's the President of the
United States of America. 89%.
Which we're dealing with today.
Commercials. Commercials.
Commercials. Commercials.
It's time the American people
began to take a look at that.
And, now we're going to
be taken your calls.
- The number is 1-800-555-0199.
- Oh, shit.
Stanley, what are you doing?
What am I doing?
I wanna call somebody up.
Stan, that's very funny.
I'm going to get these people straight.
You can't do that, Stanley.
Watch me.
Stan, you knew the deal
when you signed on.
Come on. Deals change.
Sure it is.
Let's rethink that ambassadorship.
I'm talking London. I'm talking Paris.
I'm talking a secret account
for your extra expenses...
...getting laid whenever you want.
Marine guards will
salute you all the time.
No. It's tempting, but I got
to answer to a higher calling.
- Art.
- Money?
Money? You think I did this for money?
I did this for credit. For credit.
You always knew you
couldn't take the credit.
That's one thing. But I'm
not going to stand here...
...and let two dickheads
from film school take it.
Stanley, listen to me.
Are you nuts?
- Stanley, no fooling.
- What?
You're playing with your life now.
Fuck my life. Fuck my life.
I want the credit. The credit.
Do you know what the New York
Times said about my last picture?
They called it "a thrill
ride for the ages..."
...but they didn't mention the producer.
They talked about the costumes...
...but never talked about the producer.
You know what that picture grossed?
Now I'm going to stand here...
...and let some limp-dick
film-school pansy...
...take the credit? What?
You can't do it.
Don't you tell me that!
Don't you ever tell me that!
I am the producer of this show!
If I didn't step up, you're nowhere!
I put this together
out of spit and polish!
Look at that.
That is a complete fucking fraud...
...and it looks 100%