Know what time it is?
- 2:00?
- Time to pay the fiddler.
I was counting on you
to be human about this.
Here's the bottom line, Wyatt.
I'm telling Mum and Dad everything.
I'm even considering
making up some shit.
All right, Chet. Name your price.
175 dollars and zero cents.
Cash, new bills. Crisp and clean
in my wallet by 7:00am.
- Thank you.
- Hey, what are big brothers for!
See you upstairs.
Out of the "Jungle Book".
The booze hounds return.
What a joke. Hi, girls.
Feeling kind of queasy?
How about a nice greasy pork sandwich
served in a dirty ashtray?
He pukes, you die.
- He's not laughing at you, Chet.
- Yes, I am.
Did he tell you about the woman
we made tonight?
He doesn't know
what he's talking about.
- No shit!
- No shit, Chet.
You two donkey dicks
couldn't get laid in a morgue.
- You are absolutely right.
- Get him out of here.
What?
Cold-blooded shit. He's an asshole.
Anybody with a haircut like that
is an asshole.
Psst! Lisa.
Where are you?
I'm right behind you.
Surprise.
I'm not going to hurt you.
Your lips feeI like rigor mortis
has set in.
Try and relax a little bit.
I'm only kissing you.
I wasn't expecting you to kiss me.
I mean, I was just...
That was better.
- Want to try it again?
- If you don't mind.
Yes, please.
- You sure you're only 15?
- I'll be 16 in June.
You made me.
You controI me.
What are you thinking about?
Women's gymnastics.
Well, I don't know. I'll do my best!
Good.
"Tubular Bells")
- Wyatt, where are you?
- I'm right here, Gary.
- What happened?
- I think it was a dream.
- What?
- Everything. Last night. Lisa.
The whole thing had to be a dream.
It can't be a dream, Wyatt.
We were both in it.
How can two people
have the same dream?
- There's no other explanation.
- Let's analyze this.
In your dream, did I get up in the middle
of the night and yak in your sink?
I didn't throw up?
You didn't see anything?
Maybe it was a dream.
A very weird, bizarre, vivid,
erotic, wet, detailed dream.
- Maybe we have malaria.
- Shit.
Gary. Wyatt. Breakfast.
I don't have the bucks
to pay Chet off about this.
Yo, Wyatt!
You can't fear Chet
for the rest of your life.
Why not? Lisa, please.
I don't know, Wyatt. I mean,
it's seriously affecting your sex life.
Ten seconds into my gymnastics
routine, you passed out.
You slept. I did my toes.
By the way, you're very cute.
We'll try it again some other time, OK.
- Good morning, turd brain.
- Hi, Chet.
- You spit in this?
- Not that I'm aware of, no.
Hey, that looks pretty good.
Now make yourself one, dickweed!
I like your panties.
- It's a joke, Chet.
- That's not a joke.
That is a severe behavioraI disorder.
Those are women's underpants.
Next, you'll be wearing
a bra on your head!
The old man's going to have
a stroke on this one!
- All right, Chet. How much?
- How much?
This goes way beyond payment, paI.
Come one, Chet. Please.
Well...
Your VCR should cover it, for openers.
Thank you.
For christsakes, will you cover yourself.
Are you guys looking
for something for your mum?
I really don't think so, Sue.
You guys have girlfriends?
One does really not refer
to a 23-year-old woman as a girlfriend.
Mistress, lover, sexpot.
She's a sexpot, is what she is.
You guys are the ones that got beat up
at the homecoming game, right?
Susan. Could you wrap up a bottle
of this scent for me? I like this.
Two. And why don't you
set yourself up with one.
Set yourself up.
That's three scents, please.
If you were a 15-year-old boy,
would these turn you on?
I think so, too. I'll take them.
Do you have a bra to match that?
Something in leather
or rubber or barb wire?
Give me a break!
- Check it out. Check it out.
- What?
- Five bucks?
- Finsky.
Max, what are you going to do?
You know, Gary?
For the first time in my life,
I don't feeI like a totaI dick.
Yeah, me either.
- Sorry, boys.
- You guys getting tired of this?
We're not, but there is a