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Мое дорогое Кунфу

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find him
a safe place to hide
What place is safe?
These killers would even bust
into a police station
Don't worry about me
Anyway, he won't stay
no more than 12 hours
Fine, when midnight comes
I'm kicking him out
Listen close: I won't protect him
Hawk will protect him
Phoenix. Wake up please
This is the year 2006
This isn't the world of kung fu
I believe you're the man of my destiny
So I must save you
Before I come back, please don't leave
OK?
Excuse me, I want to find Dad
Who?
He's the COOO of the zoo
There's no such a position here
You'd better go in and ask around
Brush your teeth...
Brush the upper, brush the lower
brush the left, brush the right...
What the hell? You bastard
Bastard...
Bastard
Hey, where's my watch?
In your stomach again?
Open up!
It's not mine
But it's a Rolex, so forget about it
Uncle ltchiban
Phoenix, what brings you here?
I'm looking for my Dad
Your... your Dad?
Look out!
Have you forgotten?
They can't bite through
my Metal Skin Technique
Uncle ltchiban
My Dad said he's the COOO
A very important position
But why does nobody know him?
Uh, your Dad...
Pork Chop Dad? He's by the toilet
Dad, don't go
What were all these
you said about being COOO?
COOO means...
Chief Outhouse Only Officer
Sweetie, sorry, I lied
Never mind, Dad
You earn your own living
I don't care no matter what you do
Sweetie
Dad's useless. I'm not a businessman
I can't provide my family
with a luxurious lifestyle
The most important thing is that
a family is together
Unfortunately, your Mom doesn't think so
One day, Mom will understand
What brings you here?
I think...
I've found the man of my destiny
Who is it?
He's my boss. His name is Dragon
Some more toilet paper please
Go squat on the can
and I'll bring it in a minute, OK?
He must be a talented guy
When can I see him?
Kung fu killers are chasing him
Mom won't help
That bitch never helps
Don't blame Mom
Never mind. I'll go back with you
to protect your love
Excuse me ladies
can you tell me where I am?
Why do you tease me
with skimpy outfits and feather boas?
Monster dog!
(I'm not a dog. I'm a majestic hawk)
Ouch! What happened to my butt?
(You were hit with a poison arrow)
Where's Phoenix?
(She went to find you a bodyguard)
It's after 9. I have to be at the office
(lmpossible)
Lmpossible but not impassable!
(Go back to bed like a good boy)
Have you ever seen a fist this big?
One punch will send you back to the zoo
Brother hawk, good TV programme?
(Show me your hand!)
(The other hand)
(Both hands!)
Nothing in the left, nothing in the right
Nothing on the backs, nothing in the palms
Come on, give me five
Hello, 999 Emergency Hotline
I've been kidnapped
Please call the swat team to save me
Sir
What is your location?
And who is your kidnapper?
I don't know the location
but I've been kidnapped by a bird
He says he's a hawk
You said you've been kidnapped by a hawk?
That's right
Perhaps I should transfer your call
to the Wildlife Conservation Department
or to a mental hospital
Thank you for your call, bye
It's nothing. I was bored
So I dialed 173173173
Hello
Lucky... not hurt...
Maybe not
Sorry...
If you want to leave
just climb out the window
I've got the rope ready for you
Just climb down to the street
What's your name, Ms?
My name is Dolina, Phoenix's mom
Thank you
Ms. Do... Dolina
This is the 10th floor
I haven't prepared a parachute
You'll be late for work
Thank you, Ms.
Hawk, where's Dragon?
Gone Mom!
He's got feet. He can walk
if he wants. None of my business
What do we do, sweetie?
He's a workaholic
He probably went to the office
We'll find him there, Dad
You, bad bird!
What's wrong with you?
You're alright! You haven't died...
My butt was hit with a poison arrow
and I was kidnapped by a dog
that looks like a hawk
I thought that man and woman killed you
Those two used the
Tendon-Bending Technique...
to snap all the joints in my
Мое дорогое Кунфу Мое дорогое Кунфу

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