decisions. I'm a president!
This is your two-minute warning.
This ship will self-destruct in two minutes.
Launch all escape pods
once they are filled.
What's happening? Where is he?
* Spaceballs
* Watch out!
- Where is he?
- Here.
We got a minute and 40
before the end of the world. Hang on!
* Spaceballs
Full throttle.
- Go to hyper jets.
- Going to hyper jets.
* If you're livin' in a bubble
And you haven't got a care
- Hey, where do you think you're going?
- Pizza to go!
* Then you're gonna be in trouble
Cos we're gonna steal your air
* Cos what you've got is what we need
And all we do is dirty deeds
* We're the Spaceballs
* Watch out
* We're the Spaceballs
Hey, that's my escape pod. Who are you?
I'm the bearded lady.
What are you, one of the freaks?
Hey, come back! That's my pod! No!
Come back, you fat, bearded bitch!
One pod left.
And three of us.
And I'm the president.
Well, boys, it's a very lovely ship.
I think you should go down with it.
Goodbye.
What's the matter with this belt?
* Spaceballs
This ship will self-destruct in 20 seconds.
It's your last chance
to push the cancellation button.
Cancellation button? Hurry!
* Spaceballs
* Watch out!
- Where is it? Where is it?
- It's gotta be here.
- Out of order.
- Fuck! Even in the future nothing works.
This ship will self-destruct
in exactly ten seconds.
Counting down.
Ten, nine,
eight, six
Six? What happened to seven?
Just kidding.
There's the other end. Faster!
Six, five, four,
three, two, one.
- Have a nice day.
- Thank you.
We did it!
We all did it.
So I guess you might call that
a case of... man bites droid?
On a sadder note, Pizza The Hutt,
famed half-man, half-pizza,
was found dead earlier today
in the back seat of his stretch limo.
Evidently, the notorious gangster became
locked in his carand ate himself to death.
Coming up:
Pongo's review of "Rocky Five
Thousand". Pongo?
Did you hear that?
Pizza kicked the bucket.
Now we don't have to pay him the million.
We can keep it for ourselves.
Yeah.
- Daddy! Oh, Daddy!
- Oh, Vespa, my darling.
I thought I'd never see you again.
Oh, my sweet little daughter.
I'm so happy that you're home and safe.
And, little Vespa, here's someone else
who's happy to see you.
Oh, hello.
Where have you been?
Thanks, hon.
Hiya, big stuff.
Hi, dream.
- What'll you have?
- We're just gassing up, so what's ready?
I got the space soup or the space special.
- Um, I'll have the soup.
- OK.
I'll have the cleavage. Uh, the special.
OK, one special and one soup.
- Ready to order?
- Hi. Yes, we'll both have the lunafish.
Anything to drink?
Hey, watch where you stick that thing!
Huh? Oh, look, it's got a mind of its own,
sweetheart. I can't do a thing with it.
- Jeez!
- What?
No, we were lost.
None of us knew where we were.
And then Harry began feeling around
on all the trees.
Then he said "I got it. We on Pluto".
And we said "Harry, how can you tell?"
He said "From the bark, you dummy!"
From the bark!
Is he all right?
- Hey, what's wrong with this guy?
- I don't know!
- Bring him some water!
- Water, my ass!
Bring this guy some Pepto-Bismol!
Waitress! Waitress! What did he order?
- Oh, he had the special.
- The spe... That's my order!
- Change my order to the soup.
- Good move.
Oh, no.
Not again.
* Hello, my baby
Hello, my honey
* Hello, my ragtime gal
* Send me a kiss by wire
* Baby, my heart's on fire
* If you refuse me Honey, you'll lose me
* Then you'll be left alone
Oh, baby, telephone
* And tell me I'm your own
Check, please.
Five minutes to magic time.
Are you all right, my dear?
You look a little... flighty.
Don't worry about me, Father.
I'm completely over him.
Huh! Didn't even stay for the wedding.
Just grabbed his million bucks and ran.
He didn't take the million.
- He didn't?
- No.
He just took 248 space bucks
for lunch, gas and tolls.
I can't believe you refused the money. But
we could've stayed