So? Everyone does that.
Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best.
Want a worm?
No, thanks.
Do you have Pac-Man?
No.
Space Invaders?
No.
Do you have Asteroids?
No, but my dad does.
He can't even sit on the toilet
some days.
What do you do here, Dale?
Well, I have a stack of
nudie books this high.
She's beautiful!
Would you sell me any of them?
Shit, no! I cherish them!
And I use them a lot!
How do you use a magazine?
I'll tell you how.
A guy taught me something
really neat, last year.
Have you ever bopped your bologna?
I guess we are 11, right?
No, we are 12 with Aunt Edna.
Aunt Edna? Is she still alive?
You bet!
I can't wait to see the look
on Clark's face when he hears that.
She came to help when
Eddie ruptured his spleen...
...and she's been here ever since.
She wanted to go back
to Phoenix last year...
...but Eddie wouldn't let her.
Without her Social Security,
we'd never be able to live like this.
It looks as though you've really
got your hands full.
Oh, it's not so bad!
Eddie says after the baby comes,
I can quit one of my night jobs.
How do you like yours, Clark?
Oh, medium rare, a little pink inside.
No! Your bun! Light or dark?
Either way, it doesn't matter.
Vicki, can I help you
stir that? Please?
I don't know why they call this
Hamburger Helper!
It's just fine by itself.
I like it better than Tuna Helper,
don't you, Clark?
You're the gourmet, Ed.
No meat in this?
You get plenty of meat at home.
Be polite. Have some ketchup.
Real tomato ketchup, Eddie?
Nothing but the best!
Aunt Edna!
Helper's getting cold.
Is that your Aunt Edna?
Aunt Edna! After all these years!
And you look so good!
Hi, Edna! Nice to see you again!
You remember Clark, don't you?
You were the ones who sent me
the fruitcake for Christmas.
It made me so sick!
I'm sorry. We thought
you enjoyed fruitcake.
Do you enjoy throwing up
every five minutes, Claud?
Clark.
Well, am I going to eat
or starve to death?
Catherine?
Did you tell Clark and Ellen
the good news.
No. I was just about to.
What's the good news?
You are driving me to Phoenix!
"Junior Pig Competition"?
You won this trophy for racing a pig?
Yeah. First Place.
Does anyone know about it?
Everyone knows.
Vicki, don't be offended, but being
a farmer is not too cool, you know.
Oh, yeah.
How cool...
...is this?
I'm really glad things
are going well for you.
I was laid off when they
closed that asbestos factory.
The Army cuts my disability pension.
They claimed the plate in my head
wasn't large enough.
Clark and Ellen don't want
to hear about problems.
No, no. It is very interesting.
Why don't you just ask him
for the money, Eddie?
He sure as hell can't take a hint!
Well, I didn't want to ask you, Clark.
Could you, maybe,
spare a little extra cash?
Sure, Eddie!
How much money do you need?
About $52,000.
Good-bye, baby!
You'll send those checks?
It's taken care of.
Okay, let's go. Come on, Edna.
Lay off, lay off!
Well, gotta be going.
What's this?
This is for you, Clark.
Oh, what is it?
A gift.
You didn't have to buy me a gift!
Go on and open it.
Eddie, you shouldn't have.
Those are great, Dad!
Be quiet, Russ.
Try them on.
No, no, I don't want to get them dirty.
I told you he wouldn't like them!
I love them.
I knew you did because
the last time I saw you, Clark...
...you remarked about
how much you liked mine.
I guess we better be going.
Here he is, Uncle Clark,
all walked and everything.
What is this? A dog?
He's Aunt Edna's dog, Dinky.
He watches "Family Feud."
How are you, little fellow?
You didn't get to meet Dinky last night.
He had the shits,
so he slept in the barn.
Great. I'll make some space
for him in the back.
No! Sit, sit!
Roll over! Heel!
Here. Have a good trip.
Thanks a lot.
"I found out long ago
"It's a long way down a Holiday Road
[Skipped item nr. 548]
"Holiday Road!
"Holiday Road! "
Look at these sandwiches.
Here, Aunt Edna.
Thank you.