behave yourself!
But Audrey is eating candy and
smiling at me with her mouth open!
Audrey, eat with you mouth closed!
No eating in the car, kids!
You suck, you know that?
Retard!
I am trying to concentrate on the road!
"I've had some Ionely nights
"And I'll admit I cried sometimes
"Cause you were out of my life
"But then you called my name
"And you came back again
"I feel so inspired
"Kissing your lips of fire
"Little boy sweet, little boy sweet,
"Sweet little boy of mine
"Come a little closer"
You're driving 80 miles an hour!
Doesn't seem that fast, honey?
Slow down!
I don't know why,
we're making good time.
"Love for sale
"Appetizing, yummy love..."
They're here! Eddie, come on!
I can't believe it's been so long!
Eddie, you look terrific.
Come and meet your cousins!
Look how they've grown!
You have lost weight, Catherine!
She's added a few more mouths
to the litter.
Rusty and Audrey,
cousins Vicki and Dale.
And this is Eddie Junior and Junior.
The little one hanging onto
my skirt is Daisy-Mabel.
How old are you, little one.
She was born without a tongue, Clark.
But don't worry about her. She whistles
like a bird and eats like a horse.
Take your cousins out back
and show them your worm farm.
Come in the house, Ellen.
I've so much to tell you.
Look at that car!
That's the Family Truckster.
Boy, she's a beaut!
I like those "green walls."
We had some trouble in St. Louis.
Well, you're looking really...
...fit.
This is your homestead, huh?
Yeah, I don't know for how long, though.
The bank's been after me like
flies on a rib roast.
I know the feeling.
Oh, fuck it!
I bet you could use a cool one?
Now you're talking.
I'm going steady.
And I French kiss.
So? Everyone does that.
Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best.
Want a worm?
No, thanks.
Do you have Pac-Man?
No.
Space Invaders?
No.
Do you have Asteroids?
No, but my dad does.
He can't even sit on the toilet
some days.
What do you do here, Dale?
Well, I have a stack of
nudie books this high.
She's beautiful!
Would you sell me any of them?
Shit, no! I cherish them!
And I use them a lot!
How do you use a magazine?
I'll tell you how.
A guy taught me something
really neat, last year.
Have you ever bopped your bologna?
I guess we are 11, right?
No, we are 12 with Aunt Edna.
Aunt Edna? Is she still alive?
You bet!
I can't wait to see the look
on Clark's face when he hears that.
She came to help when
Eddie ruptured his spleen...
...and she's been here ever since.
She wanted to go back
to Phoenix last year...
...but Eddie wouldn't let her.
Without her Social Security,
we'd never be able to live like this.
It looks as though you've really
got your hands full.
Oh, it's not so bad!
Eddie says after the baby comes,
I can quit one of my night jobs.
How do you like yours, Clark?
Oh, medium rare, a little pink inside.
No! Your bun! Light or dark?
Either way, it doesn't matter.
Vicki, can I help you
stir that? Please?
I don't know why they call this
Hamburger Helper!
It's just fine by itself.
I like it better than Tuna Helper,
don't you, Clark?
You're the gourmet, Ed.
No meat in this?
You get plenty of meat at home.
Be polite. Have some ketchup.
Real tomato ketchup, Eddie?
Nothing but the best!
Aunt Edna!
Helper's getting cold.
Is that your Aunt Edna?
Aunt Edna! After all these years!
And you look so good!
Hi, Edna! Nice to see you again!
You remember Clark, don't you?
You were the ones who sent me
the fruitcake for Christmas.
It made me so sick!
I'm sorry. We thought
you enjoyed fruitcake.
Do you enjoy throwing up
every five minutes, Claud?
Clark.
Well, am I going to eat
or starve to death?
Catherine?
Did you tell Clark and Ellen
the good news.
No. I was just about to.
What's the good news?
You are driving me to Phoenix!
"Junior Pig Competition"?
You won this trophy for racing a pig?
Yeah. First Place.
Does anyone know about it?
Everyone knows.
Vicki,