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redneck
newspaper in New Zealand?
Pipe down and I'll tell you.
I've been getting the paper
and checking the classifieds,
looking at cars for sale,
so as of yesterday,
for sale in this town,
some dude is selling
a stock 1970 Dodge Challenger
with a 440 engine and a white paint job.
And you wanna buy it?
Kim, I may be stupid,
but I'm not bloody stupid.
I wanna say I wanna buy it
so he'll let me test-drive it.
A 1970 Dodge Challenger
with a white paint job?
Oh, uh, Kowalski!
Kowalski from Vanishing Point.
Mate, it's a fucking classic!
If I can get this guy
to let me drive it without him,
I will blow the doors off that bitch.
What's Vanishing Point?
What's Vanishing Point?
Abs, I'm supposed
to be the illiterate one.
It's just one of the best
American movies ever made.
Actually, Zoл, most girls
wouldn't know Vanishing Point.
Excuse me. Most girls?
What the fuck are you two?
Yeah, well, we're gearheads.
Of course we watched it.
Y'all grew up watching
that Pretty in Pink shit.
Oh, I liked Pretty in Pink.
What, so you didn't watch
John Hughes movies?
Of course I did. I'm a girl.
But I also watched car shit, too...
Vanishing Point. Dirty Mary Crazy Larry.
- Gone in 60 Seconds...
- Oh...
The real one, not that
Angelina Jolie bullshit.
We have an outdoor theater in Auckland
that plays Vanishing Point.
Big Wednesday. all the classics.
What do you horny gals want?
Yeah, you got
a 1970 Dodge Challenger for sale?
Right up here, ladies.
This shit is off the fuckin' hook!
Fuckin' legendary, mate.
Sweet ass. Well, if you 'll excuse me,
I'd like to have a word with my associate.
You ladies take your time.
What are you waiting for?
Ask him to let you drive it by yourself.
I intend to, but first I need
to ask you something.
What?
If he lets us take it out on our own,
I wanna play Ship's Mast.
- Oh, hell, no!
- Keep it down!
Ain't no way I'm doing Ship's Mast.
- For Chrissakes...
- Don't blaspheme.
Sorry.
Now, what did you say
after the last time?
- Look, I know what I said.
- What did you say?
- I know I said we shouldn't...
- No.
You didn't say we shouldn't.
You said we ain't ever gonna do that again.
- But...
- But, my ass!
You said not only are we never
gonna play Ship's Mast again,
but you also said if you ever do
what you trying to do now,
to not only refuse, but that I had permission
to physically restrain your ass if necessary.
Now, did you or did you not say that?
No, no, no.
Answer the question, motherfucker.
- Did you or did you not say that?
- Yes, I said that.
- However...
- Whatever with your "however."
Look, I know I said it,
and I know I meant it...
Damn skippy you meant it!
But when I said it,
I didn't mean in America!
- Oh, nigga, please.
- For real. Really.
I meant we should never play Ship's Mast
again in New Zealand or Australia.
You are such a liar!
I know what I said, but when I said it
I didn't know I'd ever come to America,
and if I had of known
I was gonna come to America,
had the opportunity to play Ship's Mast
on the Vanishing Point Challenger...
I would have added a "however."
Right?
Okay, oddly enough,
I actually understood that.
However, just because
you talked yourself into some stupid shit
doesn't mean I have lost
my goddamn mind.
You need two people to play Ship's Mast,
and I ain't playing.
I'll be your best friend.
I don't need me no best friend
lives on the other side of Planet Earth.
I'll crack your back.
You 'll crack it anyway.
Well, of course I'll crack it anyway.
But now, while I'm here,
I'll be your back-cracking slave.
Whenever you want it, you 've got it.
You don't even have to ask.
You just order me to do it, just be like,
"Bitch, get over here and get busy."
You crack my back, give me foot massages,
and after a shower, you moisturize my butt.
Deal.
We're gonna see if this guy'll let us
take
Доказательство смерти Доказательство смерти

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