barf gun.
The Santa said he'd get it for him.
They're by the elevator.
And they're 90 bucks
without batteries or barf.
Prices do go up.
Apparently not at bargain village.
52.50.
They throw in the batteries.
I find it hard to believe cole's could be
undersold by that much.
Where did you get your information?
From your Santa Claus.
But if you go out of here,
turn to the right...
Excuse me?
Santa's telling everybody
where to shop.
If you don't got it, it's too expensive,
he's saying where to get it at the right price.
- You're serious?
- Absolutely.
Madam, will you excuse me for a moment?
Tell Santa he made me a cole's shopper.
I'm coming here for everything
but toilet paper.
Any store that puts the parent ahead
of the buck at christmas deserves my business.
Tell Mr. Cole his Santa Claus
ought to get a raise.
You want me to go with you to the chairman
and pitch an idea
That you got from Santa Claus?
If cole's doesn't have what you're looking for,
we'll find it for you,
Even if it means sending you somewhere else.
how does that sound?
It sounds like a great way
to go out of business.
Know that house in the country
where we do the catalog shoot?
You wanted to buy it.
Yes.
If this works, we're probably
looking at a bonus.
And if he hates the idea?
We're no worse off.
If we don't turn this store around,
we're all out--
From the chairman to the janitor.
Let's do it.
I...like it.
It's bold. It's fresh.
It will drive victor lamberg nuts.
It's beginning to look a lot like
christmas
soon the bells will start
And the thing that will make them ring
is the carol that you sing
Right within your heart
it's beginning to look a lot like christmas
Why?
Why didn't you think of this?
Now if this campaign is successful--
I know in my gut it will be--
Cole's will make lots of money.
The more money they make,
the harder it will be for me to buy them out.
Now I want  something done about this.
O.k., go ahead.
This seems like a pretty pointless exercise, Bryan.
I thought as long as we were here,
might as well say hello to the old guy.
Why?
Let's just say for the sake of argument
that there is a Santa Claus
And that you don't believe in him.
Is it worth the risk that you might not
get anything for christmas?
Well, I didn't believe in him last year.
I still got everything i asked my mother for.
Yeah. You get a free candy cane?
I'm trying to limit my intake of sugar.
She can go see Santa now.
O.k., come on. Go ahead.
Nice to meet you.
Hello, sir.
Oh, how do you do?
Would you like to come sit on my knee?
Good. Up you come.
Now then, what's your name?
Susan elizabeth walker. What's yours?
Mine?
Ha ha ha ha.
Well, I have lots of names.
Uh, Kriss kringle,
Santa Claus, father christmas,
saint nicholas.
If you were in holland, I'd be sinterklaas,
or in italy, le befana.
I have to speak many languages
because, of course, I travel a great deal.
That's russian.
That's swahili.
My mother's Mrs. Walker.
She's director of special events for cole's.
Uh-huh.
She runs the parade.
I know how this all works.
You're an employee of cole's.
That is true.
But you're a very good Santa Claus.
Your beard's stuck on real tight.
Usually the store Santa Claus
whiskers are too loose.
Yours look realistic.
That's because they are real.
You give them a tug.
Whoo! Ha ha ha.
Are you convinced?
Mm-hmm.
Good.
This isn't the regular Santa suit, is it?
Oh, no. This is the real Santa suit.
It's very nice.
I agree. Lovely.
Gold buttons, gold thread.
It's as real as me.
Well, you ask your daddy if I'm real.
I don't know where he is.
Well, he's--
That's my friend Mr. Bedford.
I don't have a dad anymore.
Ha. Well, now,
what can I get you for christmas?
Nothing, thank you.
Nothing?
My mother buys my gifts
if I don't  want something too stupid
or dangerous or...
Hi, mom.
Hi. It's nice to see you.
Susan,
you've taken enough of this man's time.
There's a