roommate's... brother's... ex-wife's obstetrician.
Oh, that's funny!
I want a baby.
Mmmm. Not tonight, honey. I got an early day tomorrow.
Get up. Come on. Let's get some coffee.
Oh, ok, 'cause we never do that.
Shoot! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot, or just fall down. That's good too.
- Knick fan?
- Oh, yeah.
Oh, boy, do they suck.
Hey, listen, lady.......whoa.
Look, look at your man, Ewing. Nice shot. You know what, he couldn't hit water if he was standing on a boat.
Oh yeah? And who do you like?
- The Celtics.
- The Celtics? Ha. They couldn't hit a boat if...
wait.
They suck, alright?
Oh, shut up. You know, it's a rebuilding year. You... waah!
Wha? Wha..aa? Let me get the father. Hey, we need a father over here! We need a father!
There is no father.
Oh, oh, oh, sorry.
Ok, that's ok. I'm fine. I'm... oh!
Oh, uh, ok. Right this way. All the other pregnant women seem to be goin' in here.
"They're tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch,"
"and soon they'll grow up and resent you so much. "
"Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why, "
"you cry and you cry and you cry."
"And you cry and you cry and you cry..."
- Thanks, Ross.
- Yeah. I'm paying you to stop.
Ok.
Oh, look, twins. Hi, guys. Oh, cute, cute.
No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two?
- You'll get one.
- Oh yeah? When?
All right. I'll tell you what.
When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
Why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Oh, no, no. I just meant hypothetically.
Ok, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
No, no, no.
What is it? Is there something fundamentally unmarriable about me?
- Uh, uh.
- Well?
Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack!
Hey.
Hey. Ooh, look at you, dressy-dress.
Did you go home and change?
Yeah, well, it's an important day. I wanna look nice.
Hm..Has Dr. Franzblau been by?
No, I haven't seen him.
Well, where is he? He is supposed to be here.
What if the baby needs him?
Rachel, what is the deal with you and doctors, anyway?
Was, like, your father a doctor?
Yeah, why?
No reason.
Mom, we've been through this.
No, I'm not calling him.
I don't care if it is his kid, the guy's a jerk.
No, I'm not alone. Joey's here.
What do you mean, Joey who? Joey who?
- Tribbiani.
- Joey Tribbiani.
Yes, ok. Hold on.
She wants to talk to you.
Take the phone.
Hi, yeah, it's me.  Oh, no no no, we're just friends.
Yeah, I'm single.
25.
An actor.
Hello?
- She's not much of a phone person.
- Yeah?
So, uh, so, uh, what's the deal with this father guy, I mean, if someone was havin' my baby somewhere, I'd wanna know about it, you know?
Hey, Knick fan, am I interested in your views on fatherhood? Uh, no.
Ok, look, maybe I should just go.
Maybe you should.
Good luck, and uh,
Take care, huh?
You know what the Celtics problem is? They let the players run the team.
Oh, that is so not true.
- Oh, it is.
- It isn't.
- Breathe.
- Breathe.
You're gonna kill me!
15 more seconds, 14, 13, 12...
Count faster.
It's gonna be ok, just remember, we're doing this for Jordie.
Just keep focusing on Jordie.
Who the hell is Jordie?
Your son.
No-no-no. I don't have a son named Jordie. We all agreed, my son's name is Jamie.
Well, Jamie was the name of Susan's first girlfriend, so we went back to Jordie.
What? Whoa, whoa whoa whoa, what do you mean, back to Jordie? We never landed on Jordie.
We just passed by it during the whole Jessy, Cody, Dylan fiasco.
- Ow, ow, ow, ow, leg cramp, leg cramp, leg cramp.
- I got it.
- I got it.
- I got it!
Hey, you get to sleep with her, I get the cramps.
No, you don't.
All right, that's it. I want both of you out.
- What?  He started it!
- No, you started it.
- You did!
I don't care. I am trying to get a person out of my body here, and you're not making it any easier.
- But...
- Now go!
- Thanks a lot.
- See what you did.
- Yeah, listen...
- Out!
Breathe, breathe, breathe...