Wash, soap, rinse, spin.
Ted! What are you doing here?
You can't fly this plane!
That's what I'm trying to tell them.
Elaine. I don't have time to be
gentle, so I'll be very direct.
Everyone is in a desperate situation.
Mr Striker is the only hope we got.
Those are the flaps.
This is the thrust.
This must turn on the landing lights.
- Mayday! Mayday!
- Mayday? What the hell is that?
May Day's the Russian new year.
We'll have a big parade and serve...
I can't stand it any more.
I've got to get out of here!
Calm down! Get a hold of yourself!
- Please let me handle this.
- I've got to get out...
Calm down. Get to your seat.
I'll handle it.
Calm down. Get ahold of yourself.
Doctor, you're wanted on the phone.
Everything will be all right.
- Sister, I can handle this.
- Got to get out of here!
We'd like you to have this flower.
Excuse me, sir, would you...
Donations for Reverend Moon?
Jews for Jesus?
Read about Jehovah's Witness?
How about Buddhism?
Help Jerry's kids?
- Scientology?
- For nuclear power?
Your attention, please.
No-frills passengers now arriving.
Please have your baggage
claim checks ready to show
upon leaving the terminal.
This guy has no airline experience.
He's a menace
to everything in the air.
Yes, birds, too.
OK, he's a terrible risk,
but what other choice have we got?
That's the whole story, Rex.
Everything we know.
Let's face a few facts.
I flew with Striker during the war.
He can't afford to worry about those
times when...things weren't so good.
- Right now things aren't so good.
- Let me tell you something.
Striker was a top-notch
squadron leader long ago.
Get on the horn
and talk that guy down.
Let him get the feel
of that airplane,
then you'll have to talk him
right down to the ground.
Very well.
Put Striker on the speaker.
Use my radio.
I took the wrong week
to quit drinking.
You can work them direct
from here, Captain.
Striker? Striker, this is
Captain Rex Kramer speaking.
Yes, Captain Kramer.
Read you loud and clear.
All right.
It's obvious you remember me.
What do you say we forget about
everything, except what we must do?
Let's not kid each other, Kramer.
You know I've never flown
a bucket like this.
- I'll need all the luck there is.
- Stand by, Striker.
Our one hope is to build this man up.
I've got to give him confidence.
Striker, you ever flown
a multi-engine plane?
- No, never.
- Shit! It's a goddamn waste of time.
There's no way he can land it!
You got to talk him down! You got to!
Route him into Lake Michigan. At
least avoid killing innocent people.
You're the only chance they've got.
All right.
Striker, you listen,
and you listen close.
Flying a plane
is like riding a bicycle.
It's just harder
to put baseball cards in the spokes.
First, get the feel of the plane.
Later, we'll run down
the landing procedure.
All right.
Disengage the automatic pilot.
Make no violent control movements
like you did in the fighter planes.
All right.
I'll unlock the automatic pilot.
The controls will feel very heavy
compared to a fighter.
Don't worry about that.
It's perfectly normal.
Now, one more thing.
Can somebody work the radio
and leave you free for flying?
The stewardess is here with me.
Good. Have her sit
in the co-pilot seat.
Elaine, he wants you
to sit in the co-pilot seat.
What's going on?
We have a right to know the truth.
All right, I'll level with you all.
The most important thing
is that you remain calm.
There's no reason to panic.
It's true
one of the crew members is ill.
Slightly ill.
The other two pilots are fine.
They're flying the plane,
free to pursue
a life of religious fulfilment.
The radio is all yours. Keep an eye
on number three engine gauge.
It's running a little hot.
Striker,
first I'd like to say something.
I know things must look
pretty rough up there.
If you do what I tell you
when I tell you,
there's no reason
you should lack confidence
in