cal, Joe.
- Y eah, l know.
- Did you make it up?
- l wish l had.
- Do you like it?
- Well, it's all right.
lt's showtime, folks!
? They say the neon lights
are bright on Broadway
? They say there's always magic in the air
? But when you're walkin' down that street
? And you ain't had enough to eat
? The glitter rubs right off
and you're nowhere
? They say the women
treat you fine on Broadway
? But lookin' at them just gives me the blues
? Cos how you gonna make some time
? When all you got is one thin dime?
? And one thin dime
won't even shine your shoes
? They say that l won't
last too long on Broadway
? l'll catch a Greyhound bus for home,
they all say
? But they're dead wrong, l know they are
? Cos l can play this here guitar
? And l won't quit till l'm a star
? On Broadway
? They say that l won't last too long
on Broadway...
Bozo?
- ls that your real name?
- Yes, sir.
- You sure you don't wanna change that?
- Well, if you give me the job l'll change it.
? But they're dead wrong, l know they are
? Cos l can play this here guitar
? And l won't quit till l'm a star...
Victoria Poerer.
ls this your, uh... your home phone?
? ..till l'm a star
? On Broadway
? No, no, no, no, no...
- You were in The Wiz?
- Mr Gideon, l've never been in any show.
l had to put something on the card.
l really need ajob, so l lied.
lt's all right, Rima. l lie all the time myself.
Oh, fuck him! He never picks me!
Honey, l did fuck him,
and he never picks me either!
- You were in Traffic Jam?
- Yes, sir.
- Who was the director of Traffic Jam?
- You were, Mr Gideon.
- Oh. How was l?
- Terrific.
- And who was the choreographer?
- You were, Mr Gideon.
- How was l?
- Fantastic.
That's how you get ajob.
God, l hope he doesn't pick her.
She's uglier than a witch's tit.
The expression is " colder than a witch's tit."
- You've never seen a woman's tit in your life.
- Shh. Be quiet, you two.
OK, thank you all very much.
lt was a terrific audition. Just stay in line.
Now that's what l call a real drinker's nose.
And you should know, because
you're a real drinker, aren't you, Joe?
- Yeah.
- Also heavy into speed, aren't you?
- Yeah.
- Also sleep with a great many women.
- Real turnoff, huh?
- Just the opposite.
l'll make up my mind about the men later.
l know which girls l want.
Candy, Casey, Rima,
Jennifer and Victoria Poerer.
- The one in the shocking-pink leotard?
- See if any are willing to be swing dancers.
- She's tone-deaf.
- With those legs, who cares?
Oh, Joey, l know you're in a hurry,
but l want to check your schedule.
- Same as always.
- Joey? Joey, can we talk a minute, please?
- Joey...
- What is it?
- You left me without a soprano again!
- Paul, please, will you let me handle it?
- What about Diane?
- What about Diane?
l've had her in three shows. She's wonderful.
At least she can sing. You left me
without a soprano. l gotta have a soprano!
Gentlemen, Mr Gideon...
The tall dancer with the blue eye shadow -
believe me, he'll hit the high notes.
The five Murray is talking to,
those are the