husband here?
- He`s putting on his nightcap.
Shut up, Baben! Sit here,
my child.
- I`m trembling all over.
- That`s a part of the deal.
Children, I have to say
a small speech.
Baben, my myrtle tree.
What`s going on?
This is unbelievable!
It is a unique case in the
history of mankind.
Here I sit at home, my feet
in a hot-water basin,
and then this gentleman appears
from out of nowhere,
he demands a straw hat and
aims a gun at me,
my own gun at that.
It is a tragedy. You must
understand, it is a tragedy.
My horse accidentally eats
a straw hat, while...
the lady who owns the hat
strolls with a young officer.
Then they intrude into
my house...
without a rent agreement, as
my servant Felix claims.
Where are my boots? Why didn`t
this lady go to her own place?
- So she`s a widow, you say?
- What are you talking about?
- She`s got a husband.
- A husband? Don`t tell me!
He must be a bastard and
a complete idiot.
Did you take them off - ever?
It is our noble duty...
to trick the husband and help
the young lovers.
Of course!
- Ouch!
- It`s hopeless!
Italian straw. Poppies.
I think I have a hat
just like that.
Really? Name your price.
- How much?
- Where?
The money? I have it at home.
The address! It`s rather far.
Queens Square.
- House number!
- What for?
I`ll send it to you within
an hour.
Children, for every father
there comes a sad moment...
when he has to part with his
daughter,
the only joy of his declining
years, his only support!
This tender flower... no, no...
This tender flower now belongs
to you, my son-in-law!
Love her and cherish her.
Take care of her. He doesn`t
answer, the boor.
My child, look at this tree.
I put you on your potty
on the day when...
No, I put this tree in a pot on
the day you were born.
- Let this tree be your...
- Emblem!
I got it, I got it.
This is my father-in-law. No,
he`s a piece of sticking tape.
What a bouquet! The wedding
guests are all assembled.
Leave the dog alone!
Give it to me!
- What are you doing in my house?
- That`s right!
- Your house?
- His house.
Baben, hold her.
Wait!
- What are you doing in my house?
- So this is his house?
- My house!
- His house!
- Stop waving your besom in my face.
- It is not a besom!
- You are an immoral...
- What?
... shameless creature.
- Are you talking to me?
- He` talking to me.
You brought us to this
strange man...
and your wife will spend the
night in a stranger`s house?
- I dissolve the marriage!
- Get out!
Get this besom away from me!
I`m sick and tired of you!
Get out of this man`s house
and don`t come back!
- Get out!
- Out!
- Out!
- Take it easy.
- Out! - Forgive us for this
little misunderstanding.
So, monsieur Bapertuis, we`ve
made a deal.
You will send the agreed object
to the agreed address...
exactly in one hour.
- In half an hour.
- I`ll do my best.
- What are you doing here?
- Going home to my master.
- Your master?
- Monsieur Bapetuis.
His wife owns the hat!
I told him everything!
- The mistress is not in yet?
- Do you love Felix?
Very much.
Then take a fiacre. You know
the address. 9, Queens Square.
Tell Felix to warn them.
I`ll try to stall him.
According to Article 214 of
the Napoleon Code...
a wife has the right and is to
stay with her husband,
and follow him at all times
wherever he goes.
Joke!
Attention!
Turn left!
Forward march!
One, two.
Stop! One, two! Guardsman
Tradivo, to your post!
- Corporal, sir!
- No talking at your post!
You know that the night wind
gives me a running nose.
The wind can`t hurt someone
who has wind in his head.
Forward march!
Why am I not a corporal?
My god, what terrible heat!
Devilish heat!
The surest way to catch cold.
How many times did I tell you!
Don`t put so many logs in the
stove! Well, wasn`t I right?
Nowadays it is a custom
to show off.
Instead of admitting that we
are just two common people...
of petty bourgeoisie...
You have old-fashioned