knew it wasn't going to work. OK, so I didn't know, but I had a feeling. - Gary? - Uh-huh? - Do you love me? - Sure. I love you. Unbelievable! The Oeltics always get the breaks. Two weeks before the wedding, Gary changed his mind. He said he was sorry, but he was going through a selfish phase. Luckily, the tags were still on my dress, but I couldn't return the 600 monogrammed napkins. Just once, I'd like to wear a sexy white dress blowing all around me and not have men run away screaming. Just once, I'd like to have the kind of sexual experience where you don't go to the bathroom and cry afterwards. I bet Marilyn cried in the bathroom after sex. Probably more than once. Everyone does. - Men too? - They can't, they're asleep. Maybe Melissa envied my reckless past, but some time around the mid-Eighties, I started regretting it. One day I was in line at the Mini Mart and I looked at the magazine rack. Time, Newsweek, People, it was on every cover. So, Stacy. How is the restaurant? When are they gonna make you a chef? - Soon. Do you have my results? - Yeah, don't worry, you're fine. - You tested for everything? - Yeah, everything. OK? - You're perfectly healthy. - Are you sure? I'm sure. Goodbye, Stacy. Oh, thank you for sparing a formerly flirtatious, spontaneous and much-too-promiscuous slamhound. You won't be sorry, cos from now on, I'll lead a life of pure sublimation. I'll aerobicise my little heart out. I'll compose symphonies. I won't touch human flesh. I'll give new meaning to the word "celibacy". Stacy, you don't have to commit to lifelong celibacy. Just practise safe sex. "Safe sex." Who'd have thought those two words would be in the same sentence? Maybe abstinence isn't so bad. Beats sleeping with guys who don't call you afterwards. And you and I have more in common now we're both afraid of sex. That's consoling. I miss it. I don't know how to get close to men without it. There's your boyfriend. So what? There's yours. Well, it's been ten months and 17 days, and the only man who looked safe was Dr Goodman, and I wasn't attracted to him. It seemed I wasn't attracted to anybody, which scared me more than AIDS did. - Where were you? - I'm sorry, but I got a great surprise. What? This is where we're going on our vacation. OK. "Oasis Health Spa". They're all exercising. That's not a vacation. There's all kind of social events. Dancing, parties. Look how pretty it is. Look. My mom told me about a cruise to Hawaii where we can lay in the sun for a week. But what kind of guys would we meet? Here, we know everybody will be healthy. - lt'll help with my paranoia. - Stacy. How's it going? Hi, Baylor. Do you remember him from the Fringe Festival? Oh, yeah. I'm into something very different now. I can't even put it into words. Why don't you come over? Um, uh, I'm sorry, we're having lunch. Oh, yeah. OK, great. Let me give you my new address. My new number. OK. - It's a garage arrangement. - Great. I gotta get out of this town. Goodbye! Yay! Hot Hot Hot Yessah ha-ha... - We're so colour-coordinated. - We're gonna be the best-looking there. Me mind on fire Me soul on fire Feeling hot, hot, hot Party people all around me Feeling hot, hot, hot What to do on a night like this Music sweet, I can't resist We need a party song A fundamental jam Feeling hot, hot, hot... - You two got the biggest room here. - Really? It was the honeymoon suite when this was a hotel. Why don't you two take a look around and I'll get your luggage up to your room. - Ready to go break some hearts? - Uh-huh. - Bye, darling. - Bye. See people rocking Hear people chanting Feeling hot, hot, hot... Oh, wow! This is beautiful. Oh, God, I feel so much healthier and we just checked in. It's ------------------------------ Читайте также: - текст Кто подставил Кролика Роджера на английском - текст Вий на английском - текст Такси-блюз на английском - текст Последний герой боевика на английском - текст Броненосец Потёмкин на английском |