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gotta be a toast.
All right, let's do it.
Sorry about the delay.
The microwave was made in Korea!
Oh!
Tell Mr Masuto that, as a doctor,
I can't recommend that he drinks liquor.
But, as a friend,
I'd like to propose a toast.
To a long and fruitful relationship.
I gotta hand it to you people.
You got the resiliency of ants.
45 years ago we bombed you into a pulp.
Now you practically own
the whole Pacific Rim.
Lock, stock and barrel.
I say I'chaim.
- L'chaim.
- L'chaim!
And you know how to treat your women.
I mean, you guys
practically set the standard.
- What Maurice means...
- How can they kick you in the jewels
when they're walkin'
six paces behind you?
Of course, they can stab you in the back
and rip your heart out.
Hm, yeah.
So, anyway...
I was the one who originally
brought Shelly to town.
I first met her right after she was crowned
Miss Northwest Passage.
I was one of the judges.
She was not the best-looking one of the
bunch, but she had this look about her.
You know what I mean?
Well...
you'll have to excuse me.
I've gotta go sit on the can
for a little while.
Warm liquor gives me gas.
Excuse me.
Maurice! We're in the middle of a toast.
What's the deal?
The deal?
The deal is she dumped me for him,
and now she's carrying his baby.
That's the deal.
We saw the satellite dish outside. Do you
think we can pick up the Kemper Open?
You guys like golf, huh?
- How deep d'you want this hole?
- 4 inches, with a 4.5- inch diameter.
I gotta hand it to you, Ed. Great idea.
Mr Masuto was very impressed.
Yeah. I swiped it from
a National Geographic special on Iceland.
All these bumps will be smoothed out
before you tee up.
Mr Masuto wants to draw up plans
for a 36-hole, all-Astroturf golf course,
- complete with drainage, at his resort.
- You'll be the doctor?
The attending physician.
That's the game plan anyway.
"Physician in residence"
at a top-of-the-line vacation resort.
Sort of like Gopher on Love Boat?
Gopher was the purser.
Now he's a... he's a what?
- Congressman.
- Right.
Too bad the show was a hit -
he might've been an ex-president.
Isaac was the bartender,
and Captain Stubing was the captain.
Right. OK, Ed, you're doin' a great job.
Remember you gotta
stretch out these seams.
- Stretch out these seams!
- I wonder what she wants.
I don't have to justify myself to you!
You don't see anything tacky
about dropping a lime-green rug here?
To you it's a rug, to me it's a 355-yard
par four with two sand traps and a dogleg.
Then why don't you just hoist a canvas
over the trees, paint it blue...?
- That's not a bad idea.
- Drain the lake, line it with concrete,
- stock it with goldfish!
- Did you just come here to give me grief?
- You're in the wedding party.
- I am? Why?
Holling didn't care who his best man was,
Shelly picked you.
- Why?
- You're her OB.
- What?!
- Just be there, Fleischman, on time.
- And try to be festive.
- Any other commands?
- Shelly would like Maurice to sing.
- Don't count on him.
- Why not?
- He's in negotiations with the Japanese.
- A lame excuse. Make sure he's there.
- Why can't you?
You're the best man.
Do something to earn your job distinction.
- What's your job title?
- Maid of honour.
Heavy load!
You wanna go over
the ceremony with Chris?
- With Chris?
- He's ordained.
- Chris is ordained?!
- He answered an ad in Rolling Stone.
- Rolling Stone?!
- Stop repeating everything I say.
It's annoying, and I'm in a time crunch.
- I gotta go pick out the menu.
- You love every minute of it.
I do not. I detest weddings.
I don't have to justify myself to you.
- Daddy!
- Hey, baby girl!
- Where's Uncle Bart and Aunt Louise?
- They had to stay at the cannery.
That's what happens when your girl gets
knocked up in the middle of a salmon run.
Daddy, this is your soon-to-be son-in-law,
Holling Vincoeur.
Holling, this is my daddy, Gorman Tambo.
Your soon-to-be second father.
- Howdy.
-
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