to the
woods, dig a hole, and sit in it.
Well, I have an idea.
Keep the van, and get
a bumper sticker that
says, "If this vans a-rockin',
don't come a-knockin'."
Always helpful.
Oh, Georgie, what are you doing here?
Just dropped in for a visit.
You, uh, you never called me back.
Uh... the phone broke.
Well, we got to get moving.
What? Where are you going?
We have a catered affair.
It's creative black tie. Move, woman.
No Chinese leftovers. George is gettin'
suspicious.
Elaine, I'm sorry I'm late.
I'm gonna be in the can.
Okay, Jack.
Can I use your phone?
Sure.
Puddy? It's Elaine. We're through.
Yeah, that's right. Again.
Nice captain's chairs, huh?
Aye, aye.
Oh, there's a spot. Just back up.
Hold on. There must be a truck backing up.
No, that's us.
Great. You know, Frankie,
I was wondering.  What if
I decided that it's silly
to drive a van, because, you know,
I live in New York City.
Is there maybe some way
I could exchange it?
You don't like the van?
No, no, no. Just hypothetically.
I gotta go to the park.
No! No, you don't! No woods.
I love the van. I'm a van guy.
Check it out.
Rain and sleet may not stop
them, but let's see them
get by... these bricks.
Where'd you get the bricks?
Jerry, the whole building is brick.
So you want to take a
ride with me out to Jersey?
I'm gonna try to sell the van to a lot.
A dealer? Are you insane?
No, take out an ad. Sell it privately.
I don't think I want to meet the people
that are in the market for a used van.
Come on, Jerry, just let me help you.
OK.
All right! OK!
Right, here we go.
Yeah. OK, so... "For sale.
For Sale A big,
juicy van."
And, ooh, you gotta put down,
"interesting trades considered."
I don't want to trade.
No, you don't have to.
It's all about tickling their buying bone.
Hey, you know what? This is all your mail.
They're puttin' it in my box now.
Oh, that's it. They have gone too far.
They keep pushing me, and pushing me.
Now I got no choice but to go
down there... and talk to them.
Hey, Jerry. I'd like you to meet someone.
This is Jack.
May I help you?
Yeah, I'd like to cancel my mail.
Certainly. How long would
you like us to hold it?
Oh, no, no. I don't think you
get me. I want out, permanently.
I'll handle this, Violet. Why don't you take
your three hour break?
Oh, calm down, everyone.
No one's cancelling any mail.
Oh, yes, I am.
What about your bills?
The bank can pay 'em.
The bank.
What about your cards and letters?
E-mail, telephones,
fax machines. Fedex, telex,
telegrams, holograms.
All right, it's true! Of
course nobody needs mail.
What do you think, you're so
clever for figuring that out?
But you don't know the
half ofwhat goes on here.
So just walk away,
Kramer. I beg of you.
Is everything all right here,
Postal Employee Newman?
Yes, sir, I believe everything is all squared away.
Isn't it, Mr. Kramer?
Oh, yeah. As long as I stop getting mail!
Welcome back.
Oh!
Quick for a... catered affair.
I don't know what you mean.
You ditched me. That's twice.
Now I demand to know what's going on!
George, we've had it with you.
Understand? We love you like a son,
but even parents have limits.
The breakups, the firings.
And every Sunday with the calls.
What my wife is trying to say
is that this is supposed to be our time.
I'm not following.
We're cuttin' you lose.
You're cuttin' me loose?
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm
going to make love to your mother.
They don't want to see me anymore!
But this is what you've always wanted.
It is. I'm just not ready yet.
Aw, that's kind of sweet.
Ah, shut up, Jerry.
My parents think they can ignore me.
Heh heh.  Well, they
better think again.
Oh, no. George, please.
What are you going to do?
You remember my cousin
Rhisa? I'm gonna date her.
Mother of God.
One little wink. She'll
freak out, tell my parents.
They'll be all over
me. Who is this guy?
That guy Elaine's dating
seems really familiar to me.
I