Not you! Them!
This way, please.
I think you've made a terrible mistake.
I told you to freeze, mister.
May we blink?
- Thank God you're all right.
- I'm fine. I'm just fine.
There was a big
misunderstanding tonight.
Excuse me. Would you and Mrs. Shirley
like to step outside so we can finish here?
- Don't bother. I'm not pressing charges.
- What?
It was a mistake.
Mistake? Honey, you were kidnapped.
I did something I shouldn't have...
...and these people called me on it.
This is Clark Griswold and his family.
Welcome to our home.
What's left of it.
Release B Squad.
What's going on here?
Remember how I was toying with the
notion of suspending Christmas bonuses?
You didn't.
Of all the cheap,
lousy ways to save a buck!
That's pretty low, mister.
If I had a rubber hose...
I changed my mind.
I'm reinstating all the bonuses.
Look!
Look!
It's Santy Claus.
Uncle Clark, it's Santy Claus.
It's the Christmas star.
And that's all that matters tonight.
Not bonuses or gifts or turkeys or trees.
See, kids...
It means something different
to everybody.
Now I know what it means to me.
That ain't the frigging Christmas star.
It's the light
on the sewage treatment plant.
Sewer gas.
Don't drop that!
"And the rocket's red glare
"The bombs bursting in air
"Gave proof through the night
"That our flag was still there
"Oh, say does that
"Star-spangled banner yet wave
"O'er the land of the free
"And the home of the brave?"
Play ball!
Merry Christmas, Sparky.
Merry Christmas, honey.
I did it."It's that time
Christmas time is here
"Everybody knows
There's not a better time of year
"Hear that sleigh."
"Gonna make this holiday
As perfect as can be
"Just wait and see
This Christmas vacation.
"This old house
Sure is looking good
"Got ourselves the finest snowman
In the neighborhood.
"Ain't it fun?
"Always on the run
That's how it's done
"On Christmas vacation.
"Let's all deck the halls
"And light the lights
"Get a toasty fire
"Burning bright.
"Give Saint Nick
"The warmest welcome
That he's ever had
"We're so glad it's Christmas vacation.
"And when the nights
"Are peaceful and serene
"We can cuddle up
And do our Christmas dreamin'.
"Peace and joy and love
"Are everywhere
"You can feel the magic in the air.
"Let the spirit of the season
Carry us away
"Hip, hip, hooray
For Christmas vacation."
That was beautiful, honey.
Take it, Russ.
Dad, can you explain again
what we're doing?
We're kicking off our fun,
old-fashioned family Christmas...
...by heading out to the country
in the front-wheel drive sleigh...
...to embrace the frosty majesty
of the winter landscape...
...and select that most important
of Christmas symbols.
We're not driving way out here
so you can get one of those stupid ties...
...with the Santa Clauses on it,
are we, Dad?
No, I have one of those at home.
What we're looking for today
is the Griswold family Christmas tree.
- What's the matter?
- Some jackass is riding my tail.
Slow down and let him pass.
Don't provoke them.
Hey, kids. Look, a deer!
Clark! Slow down!
You want to ride behind
somebody like that?
I'm going to pull around them...
burn some dust, here.
Eat my rubber.
Dad, I think what you mean is,
"Burn rubber" and "Eat my dust."
Whatever, Russ.
Eat my road grit, liver lips!
That's enough of that.
Speaking of Christmas trees,
can one of you tell me...
...what the first kind of tree
displayed at the White House was?
They're back.
Stop it! I don't want to spend
the holidays dead.
Honey, please. I'll do the driving, okay?
Will you just take it easy?
I'm in complete control.
I'll get around this egg timer.
Uh... Dad?!
We're all right! Thank God!
Clark, we're stuck under a truck!
Do you honestly think I don't know that?!
Come on, you guys. Don't fight.
For Christ's sake,
I didn't do this on purpose.
Our Father, who art in heaven...
...hallowed be Thy name.
And forgive my husband.
- He knows not