I see.
Address?
Paradise.
Pardon me?
It's the name of the farm.
Alright.
Date of birth?
Oh...
Late May, early June, 1940.
You don't know your birthday?
We never found out.
I was found near a ditch
during the war.
I was screaming
- next to a dead woman.
- Your mother?
- No.
- Yes, it was!
Great scenario for the jury.
Who took you in?
Social services.
A social service baby,
even better!
What then?
Well, then...
At age 10 I went to the Pйcouts'.
To Paradise. The farm.
You worked hard, they beat you.
They beat you.
At night, starving, exhausted,
you slept on a bale of hay.
Yes, you slept in the hay,
you were hungry.
Well, I was thinner then.
See what I mean?
Such an unhappy childhood!
And after that?
After that I gained some weight.
No, then what happened?
Then the story continued.
But Mrs. Pйcout died.
I was alone with Mr. Pйcout
and his daughter, Lulu.
She became my wife.
All in the family, great!
When'd you get married?
When I got back from the service.
After Algeria.
- They sent me home.
- You were in Algeria?
How long?
One day.
I was injured on day one.
You were wounded?
You bet. Look at this.
See that?
It doesn't show much.
I had a great doctor.
Yes, it shows!
- Really?
- Yes.
So you were wounded
in combat, great.
Well, combat, uh...
In Algiers, I got off the boat.
There was a truck backing up.
It sent me flying.
Both feet smashed up,
I went to Marseille hospital,
then back to Paradise.
That was it.
But I got a medal.
- Like everyone else.
- I should hope so.
And a tiny allowance.
Better than nothing.
So you got back from Algeria
and married...
Lulu... Lucienne.
Not for a while.
You were lovers first?
Sure.
For a long time.
How old was she,
- the first time?
- I don't know.
13 or 14.
Corrupting a minor.
Also known as rape.
Oh, rape... rape...
We were the same age,
and she's the one
who raped me.
Try telling that to a judge!
She was always bugging me.
"Wanna play doctor?"
- "Mom and Dad?"
- You didn't like it.
I sure didn't.
Never did.
Even as a girl,
she was an evil witch.
Why'd you marry her?
Because I'm an idiot.
I'm an idiot, that's all.
Excuse me.
No, I don't mind.
I love the smell of smoke
since I quit.
- Here.
- Thanks.
Only one thing
bothers me so far...
Your unhappy childhood,
your marital suffering,
the buckets, tires,
urine in the soup,
I can't really use that.
Looking for excuses
is like pleading guilty.
What time is it?
I never wear a watch.
Gives me palpitations.
Funny. If I had a watch,
I'd check it all the time. Stress.
But I can tell you the time
within 3, 4 minutes.
For example, now it's 4:15.
What time is it?
4:15, sir.
How'd you know?
The goats always let you know
- when it's milking time.
- Of course, I understand.
Where were we?
- Pleading guilty.
- Precisely.
We're not guilty.
We were defending ourselves.
- The act was involuntary.
- That's right.
The cause
of the argument is unclear.
She wasn't cheating?
It was unimaginable?
Well...
I haven't said everything.
You think
I like it,
the whole village laughing at me?
I've got my pride too.
She had a lover?
- Sure?
- Cross my heart, hope to die.
Don't say that.
Who is it?
My best friend.
Wow, that's...
that happens a lot.
What does he do?
He's a mechanic.
Ok, it's all in place.
You're hurt, broken,
you criticize your wife.
You mention divorce.
She goes after you.
Now it doesn't add up.
She has to threaten you!
She didn't have
a gun or fire poker?
The poker was too far away.
But... wait.
How about a soup tureen?
- What tureen?
- The one she threw.
Now I remember.
I've got it.
Clear as holy water.
I say divorce, and bam!
Tureen!
It just missed my head.
Why didn't you say so?
Original, better than a gun or poker!
That's good, it sounds true!
Didn't touch it,
- did you?
- What?
A tureen breaks,
gets soup all over.
- You didn't clean?
- Heck no.
Alright...
Now do as I