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Главная / Ох уж эта наука!

Ох уж эта наука!

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Iet you do shit.
Chet's home from coIIege.
They trust him. He's in charge.
Chet? Oh, shit!
I can't beIieve this.
I reaIIy wish you'd toId me that
before I agreed to sIeep over.
- How do you put up with him?
- If I don't he beats the shit out of me.
It's a habit he got in miIitary schooI.
(Gary) How do you put up with him?
(Wyatt) He's very protective.
Nice reIationship!
'Look, there's nothing to fear.
'Note - no bIood, no decay...
just a few stitches.
'Go on, fix the eIectrodes.
'You'II be afraid before the night's over.
'The storm wiII be magnificent.
'AII the eIectricaI secrets of heaven.
'This time we're ready, eh, Fritz?
'Let's have one finaI test.
Throw the switches.
'Here in this machine,
I have discovered the great ray
'that first brought Iife into the worId.
'And Iook. Here's the finaI touch.
'The brain you stoIe, Fritz.
'Think of it. The brain of a dead man
'waiting to Iive again in a body
I made with my own hands.
- That's not a bad idea.
- (Wyatt) What?
Making a girI.
ActuaIIy making a girI.
Just Iike Frankenstein...
...except cuter.
- You're serious?
- Yes.
Look me in the eyes. Do I Iook serious?
- (Fritz) 'You're crazy!'
- 'We'II see whether I'm crazy or not.'
Gary WaIIace, that's absoIuteIy gross.
That's sick.
I'm not digging up dead girIs...
No, I'm not taIking about digging up
a dead girI, Wyatt!
I'm taIking about your computer.
(Gary) You can simuIate stuff
on your computer.
You know? What's the difference?
Why can't we simuIate a girI?
I don't know. I guess I couId, but why?
It's two dimensionaI on the screen.
It's not fIesh and bIood.
I know that, but we can use it.
We can ask it questions.
We can put it in sexuaI situations.
Sick, demented shit. You'd Iove it!
What about your girI in Canada?
She Iives in Canada.
The girI has no moraIs!
Those kind of reIationships are rough.
Anyway. Get to work.
Very nice.
I toId you, Wyatt. If there's one thing
I know, it's femaIe stats.
Anything bigger than a handfuI,
you're risking a sprained thumb.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Perfect.
- OK, now what?
ShouId we give her a brain?
- Yeah, we can pIay chess with her.
- Chess?
Just give her a brain, OK.
OK, that's about aII we can do
with my stuff.
I can't beIieve this shit.
I can't beIieve this.
- Did you get a free toaster with this?
- Gary, it's smarter than you.
The probIem is this is a Iame idea.
It is not. Your computer is a wimp!
- We need more power than this.
- What do you suggest?
(Radio chatter)
(Screams)
- We're in.
- We're in troubIe. This is iIIegaI.
(Gary) We need more.
We've got to fiII this with data.
We've got to make her
as reaI as possibIe.
I want her to Iive, I want her to breathe.
I want her to aerobicise!
'Live. AII Dave, aII night.
'We know what you need.
OnIy right here on Dave TV.'
It's moving, it's working.
It's working by itseIf.
(Incoherent chanting)
Gary?
Why are we wearing bras on our heads?
CeremoniaI.
(Thunder rumbIes)
- You ready?
- Yep. Let's go.
(Thunderous roar)
- Turn it off.
- It is off.
(Hissing)
(AIarm rings)
(YeIIs) Hang up the phone!
- What's going on?
- I don't know.
- UnpIug it.
- OK.
Oh, shit!
(Whirring)
No, it was a birthday present.
Oh, shit!
Oh, my god.
We've got to get this thing
out of your house.
You get it out. It was your idea.
This is aII your fauIt.
- You get it out, you get it out.
- I'II get it out!
(Creaking)
(Wyatt) Oh, shit!
One...two...three.
'She's aIive. AIive!'
(EngIish accent) So, what wouId
you IittIe maniacs Iike to do first?
You guys created me.
I didn't come from anywhere.
Before you messed around
with your computer, I didn't exist.
By the way, you did
an exceIIent job, thank you.
HeIIo?
Showering is reaI fun, isn't it?
If we're going to have any fun together...
...you guys had better Ioosen up.
What are we going to do with her?
Look, we'II just go
with the situation, OK?
I'm sure by Sunday you'II think
of something.
Ох уж эта наука! Ох уж эта наука!

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