little sparrow.
- Roman, it's got ears!
Jesus Marie! It's a tiny flying mouse,
not a grizzly bear.
I am not going back in there
until you get it out.
- We'll get it out. Chet?
- What?
Go get a shovel. Go in there
and get that radar-guided vermin.
- Yeah.
- Why me?
It's your cabin.
We didn't order one with bats.
- You stay here too, you know.
- You're the host.
- Stop fighting and go kill it.
- I don't think we have to kill it.
- Kill it!
- No, it didn't do anything.
It attacked me.
Okay, he's wimpin' out.
I'll have to take care of it.
I am not wimping. I am just thinking.
There's a big difference.
You want me to take care of the thing,
I'll take care of the thing.
I was just wondering who was
gonna do it. I'll do it.
Like to get some sleep.
That's what I'd like to do.
Afraid of a little bat.
Oh!
- So?
- It buzzed me.
We need a plan. It's bigger than
I thought. It's about a two-pounder.
- Two-pounder?
- Yeah, big wings.
It's got the teeth.
Terrible. It's frightening.
I think we have to...
we have to do something.
What we need, Roman, big plan.
That's what we need.
We'll have this little baby
squealing mayday by midnight.
Let's split up.
- Do you see him?
- He's hiding.
- I know that.
- Turn out the lights.
- Why?
- He's nocturnal. He'll think it's daytime like this.
Good point.
- Now we got him. - Come on,
you little sonar-guided rodent.
- Connie, bats carry rabies, don't they?
- Among other things.
- I'm gonna call him now.
- Okay, just be still.
- Are you kissing him or are you calling him?
- No, I'm calling him down.
That's just the sound they make.
The high-pitched squeal.
Right there, Dad.
Look up!
I got him!
Think fast!
Get the light on him.
Get the light on him.
Dad, keep your eye on the bat.
Look at that thing move!
Christ almighty!
Oh, geez, my head!
Where is he? He's in
the rafters. He's refueling!
- Where are you?
- Right here!
- He's on my face!
- Hold still!
We got it!
- We got it!
- Oh, the pain.
Ooh, that had to hurt.
What a fighter.
Boy, he was
something! I salute him!
But...
we gotta get some sleep.
Ooh!
Hey.
Glad to see ya.
- Yeah. What time do you get off work tonight?
- 8:00.
- Great. I'll meet you at 9:00?
- Okay. Where?
I don't know.
You're the one that lives here.
- Um, the bait shop?
- Sure.
I'll buy you some worms.
- You won't ditch me?
- Wait a second.
- Why would I ditch you?
- I don't know. Just waiting for it to happen.
If I ditch you,
you have my permission...
never to speak to me
as long as we both shall live.
- Promise?
- Promise.
I gotta go.
- See ya later.
- Bye.
- Yeah, that should do it.
- That's a good idea.
- Yeah, that should do it.
- That's a good idea.
I'll have the Royal Canadian
mounted beef barley soup.
- Ooh, yeah.
- Then that bucket of salad.
- I'll split that with you. Yeah.
- You will?
Do that. That would help.
And then, I guess, the medley of perch.
That's my favorite.
- Okay.
- Miss?
What's the old ninety-sixer?
That's our world-famous
Paul Bunyan's blue ox steak.
It is a 96 ounce
prime aged beef steak.
And if you or any member of your party
orders the old ninety-sixer and finishes,
everybody eats for free.
- Not bad, huh?
- Wanna go for it, girls?
- Oh, Roman!
- How about you, Chet?
- People seem to like that.
- I'll try it. What the heck!
- Seriously, though, has anybody ever eaten one?
- Oh, no, not in my lifetime.
Bon appetit.
Oh, good God!
- Look at that.
- Check it out.
How is he?
Ooh. That's good. Processing
very nicely. All right, continue.
- All right.
- I did it.
- I think that just about does it.
- He's not done yet.
He may take a little while
with that last bite,
- but it'll go down.
- That ain't the last bite.
Sure it is. There's nothin'
on that plate but gristle and fat.
- Oh, God, no.
- No problem.
If I can get
a dessert down him,
could you throw in a couple
Paul Bunyan hats for the kids?
Mind if I