waste that I run
a lowly little retail outlet.
No, not if you're good at it.
I'm good in bed. Should I be a whore?
It's great.
Did you say that you went to your prom?
Yeah, sure.
- Was it terrible?
- It was the worst.
But it's supposed to be,
you know what I mean?
But you have to go, right?
Well, you don't have to.
I mean, it's not a requirement.
I have this girlfriend
who didn't go to hers,
and every once in a while she gets
this really terrible feeling, you know,
like something is missing.
She checks her purse, you know,
she checks her keys,
she counts her kids, she goes crazy,
and then she realizes
that nothing is missing.
She decided it was side effects
from skipping the prom.
I don't know. I mean, part of me says
just go and get it over with.
And this other part of me says
it's a stupid tradition
and what's the point?
Well, you know,
you could say that life itself
is a stupid tradition.
But don't analyze it, just go.
Put that back!
- You missed my eye by an inch!
- Half an inch.
This ain't the public library, light fingers!
I'll get it.
Trax, what do you want?
Tyrone, you blow.
Yeah, I'm working. Leave me alone.
That's thrilling!
I cook for you, I do your laundry,
I sleep with you,
now you want a ride to work.
Please grow up!
Take the bus.
Take a cab.
- How you doing?
- Fine.
Good.
- Can I help you?
- Yeah. Yeah.
Can I get your opinion
on something here?
Maybe.
Maybe.
This any good?
Sticks and stones, Tyrone.
- It's hot. White hot.
- Sticks and stones.
Good, I'll take it.
Okay. Will that be cash or charge?
American Express Platinum Card,
maybe?
Take a bus to the zoo!
Cash.
You know,
every time you go to the john,
you lose IQ points.
It's Walter Mondale.
- And just $7.50 is your change.
- Thanks.
Tyrone, no.
- I don't need a bag.
- No?
No.
I can't do these things for you.
- Thanks. Thanks.
- Enjoy it.
Bondage has no place in my life.
Since when?
Since I spent the night tied up
in the backseat of your car!
- Jena?
- Yeah.
Would you ever consider going out
with somebody that had money?
I don't think it makes a difference.
I mean, it's material.
Simon? Simon.
What would you do
if your father came home a rich man?
Kiss his ass.
- See?
- See what?
- What Simon just said.
- What...
Andie, what are you getting at?
Are you... Are you going out
with a rich guy or something?
- I gotta go.
- Hey, wait! Wait!
- You didn't answer my question.
- No.
- Good.
- Simon, it's been stimulating.
- How long I been coming here?
- I don't know, a couple years.
Okay, so, you know, we're buddies.
We're close, right?
Oh, yeah, oh, yeah. Very, pal.
Okay, so how many times
have you let me in?
I never let you in, you know that.
- So you see what I'm saying?
- I don't know. What are you saying?
What I'm saying is
my girlfriend is in there,
and I'm out here.
Well, she's a girl and she's my friend,
so she's a girlfriend.
But she's in there, and I'm out here!
I mean, you're a sensitive,
sexually potent kind of guy.
You gotta know how that hurts.
Now let me ask you a question,
seriously.
Why does she come here,
knowing I don't let you in?
- Huh? Think about it.
- I don't know.
All right, my advice to you is dump her.
Lose her. You don't need that.
You see what I'm saying?
You see the point I'm trying to make?
Love's a bitch, Duck. Love's a bitch.
- Ain't it the truth.
- Oh, it's the truth.
- High-five.
- All right.
Go for it.
You wanna try a cigarette? Come on.
Oh, the babe, the babe, the babe.
Hey, honey, honey,
let me ask you a personal question.
If you worship the Duck, why don't you
hang out somewhere he could get in?
Good night, Dice Man!
Hey, say hello to the wife and kids,
you know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
You see, the Dice Man is dyslexic.
He gets everything backwards.
- What he meant to say was, like, if I...
- It's okay, Duckie.
Oh, okay. 'Cause you're sure?
Because if he offended you,
I would