here
since it opened, there's no way.
Oh, that's too bad.
It's just for royalty, huh?
Hey, hey, hey, hey, Goldilocks. Come here.
- Girl, where have you been all my life?
- Frozen.
I can dig that.
Yeah, come on in. Come on in.
- Really?
- Yeah, come on.
Hey, you and me dance a little later? Yeah.
Hey, what's this, prom night?
Take a hike, man. Go on. I hate taffeta.
I have to go into the trees.
- The trees?
- You know, someplace private.
Oh, the ladies' room.
Here, it's right over here.
- Thank you.
- Right through there. I'm gonna stay here.
Sorry.
- Wow.
- Hi.
That's really beautiful.
Passion Pink. All the guys love it.
You want to try?
Thank you.
Look, you have to turn it. Like this.
Oh.
Did you make that?
- You've never tried lipstick before?
- No.
Well, you put it on, you rub it on your lips.
And then you go like this.
- Okay?
- Oh, yeah. Everything's just fine.
Still here.
And what about you know who?
Who?
Who?
The enchanted peasant girl, you idiot.
- That's who.
- Oh, yeah.
- Is she safe?
- Ja. Yes, of course.
Good. Good. Oh, that's good.
You see, my plan, it is working.
We have succeed to get her
and the jewels out of Hauptmann-Koenig.
In a few weeks, we be off to Bermuda.
Bermuda.
Never to return to that queen
and that armpit of country again.
What country is that?
Hauptmann-Koenig, stupid!
I'm sorry, honey, but the bartender's
never heard of yak's milk,
so I brought you Pepsi instead.
- You want to run a tab?
- Yeah, thanks.
It's diet soda.
No calories, no sugar, no caffeine.
Oh, we had something like that
back home called water.
This is easier to find.
Well, I love this place.
Mmm.
Good.
- Do you want to dance?
- Oh, I'd love to.
All right, let's go!
- Hi, precious.
- I think he's cute.
- Hello, beautiful.
- Hello.
- Are you a general?
- I'm a notary public.
- You wanna dance, baby?
- I already have a man.
Come on, feel the beat.
Okay.
That's it.
Are you under some kind of a spell?
- Come on, Jessie, follow me.
- I'm trying.
Wait. Wait. That's not dancing.
That's not dancing. This is dancing.
I've danced alone a thousand times
To songs that no one else could even hear
I've reached into the flame of love
I couldn't hold it
And it disappeared
I've lived to learn to hate the blues
I've lived with everything but you
I can't believe my eyes
I see you here
Lookin'just the way you should
Now, you comfortable?
As comfortable as I can be
in front of the probing eye of the camera.
Oh, come on,
you're not on national television.
This is just your own
personal dating videocassette.
Now, relax. We're rolling.
Okay. What is your name?
I am Mr...
- Jones.
- Good. Very good.
And, Mr. Jones,
what is it that you do for a living?
Well, I am the manager of a major...
Dog...
Pet...
A major pet emporium.
Now, tell me, what is the most
exciting thing that ever happened to you?
That would have to be knee surgery.
You know,
I think we should take a different tack.
- Is this your cottage?
- Yeah.
Your mother must be a very wealthy lady.
Well, as a matter of fact,
she does have her own business,
but we don't want
to discuss it with her. Okay?
We'll just... We'll be very quiet.
- Okay.
- Okay.
Here is our dating dossier.
You just look under the category
that you're interested in.
Age range, personality preferences.
You know, it's all listed.
- Oh, you're home late.
- Oh, yeah.
Stopped off to look at an apartment.
Well, you know, it wouldn't be
the end of the world if you stayed here.
This is a perfectly nice, normal home.
Mom, I'm a big boy now.
I need to be on my own, okay?
Good night.
- What are you doing?
- Oh, I've changed my mind.
I've made a terrible mistake.
You don't know me.
I have never been here.
You have never seen me.
I have never ever... Oh, I'm sorry.
Here's $10. Here's money for the tape.
I'll pay for that. Send