Silverware Clatters]
Ronald? Not at the table, please.
So have you saved up enough money?
Yeah, Fifteen hundred dollars!
Yeah, I mowed 331 miles
of grass this summer.
That's $4.54 per mile.
Hmm, The Ronald Miller
Story: My Life OnA Mower.
- [Chuckie Sighs]
- How much is the microscope?
- Telescope.
- Oh, well.
It's $1,000, and it's on sale.
Then I'm gonna deposit the
rest in a money market account.
I'm proud of you, son. You
worked, you earned, you saved.
You ask. Hey, big Dave. How 'bout, uh,
spottin' me a 20 to
purchase some necessities?
- Why? What's up, son?
- PreschoolJam session at Julie's.
Okay. And what about you, Ronald?
You got any back-to-school
parties lined up?
Yeah, the Saturday night card game.
Ooh! Cards with the 'tards.
- [Groans] Smack him.
- Hey, bro, I'm only kidding.
I mean, who could beat a night
of cards, chips, dips and dorks?
[Laughing]
Well, guys, read 'em and weep.
- [Laughs]
- [Sighs]
[Exhales] Your deal.
[Crickets Chirping]
Ronald! Your deal.
[Chips Clattering]
Let's do something different.
What do you mean?
We've been playing poker for two years.
Let's play another game.
Dealer's choice.
Hearts.
####[Dance Rock]
- Fran, isn't it?
- Yeah!
Wow! Wow, can I pet it?
- I'm sorry. It's dead.
- Ooh, cool outFit!
Ooh, what a severe suede.
You guys, it's no big deal. Um,
Bobby sent it to me from Iowa.
You know, they have
Fine leathers down there.
Oh, yeah, the best leathers come
from Rome, Paris and Des Moines.
I don't remember this. I was
Just in your closet yesterday.
Um, I probably had it
somewhere else. I don't know.
Hey, Fran, do you wanna
go mingle a little bit?
My mom won't let me near
suede. It's too hard to clean.
Yeah, I know. My mom feels the same way.
Did I tell any of you girls
about my many scholarship offers?
- Mm-hmm. - [Boy]
Hey, John boy!
- Yeah! Quint! Hi!
-John!
Watch it! Ooh. Sorry, hon.
- [Whispers] Oh, my God.
-Don't worry. It's only wine.
just rub some salt on it. It'll come out.
Oh, oh.
I mean, it's not like I ruined it.
[Sighs]
Oh.
Damn it.
Now, for the same price, I can
sell you this Five-inch telescope.
- Oh, it's only Five inches.
- Well, it has an optical inverter.
- Hmm.
- Take a look. Take a look.
It gives you an erect image
rather than upside-down.
Hmm. Yeah. Ah, yes!
I see the erection.
I'll be right back.
I'll wrap it up for you, Ronald.
Yes, I, I relate to your
dilemma, miss. I really do.
But we have a policy of no exchanges,
especially after a garment
has been marinated in Ripple?
All right, now, I will
compromise, all right?
Um, I, I will work here after
school and on weekends...
Would you listen to me? I will work
here after school and on weekends,
and all you need to do is give me
a replacement outFit as an advance.
- Listen, honey.
- What?
I'll repeat your
alternatives one last time.
You can keep your outFit and
dye the rest of it cranberry.
- Or you can purchase a new one.
- [Sighs]
Would you please help
me? I will do anything.
- [Sobs]
- Tsk. It's not that bad.
- What are you talking about? Are you high?
- I want to rent you.
You want to rent me?
Yeah. You pretend you like me, and
we go out for Just a few weeks...
and that will make me popular.
just going out with me is
not gonna make you popular.
Well, I have $1,000 that says it will.
I think you've mowed one too many lawns.
You're right.
Tsk.
I believe we have decided
against purchasing the outFit.
Donald!
Oh! You made it!
- I was afraid you weren't gonna meet me.
- Mellow out, Donald.
I said 8:05. I'm here, right?
Relax, anyway. It's only school.
Yeah, well, this is not
my average opening day.
I'm about to walk the cool hallway.
- I usually go the long route through
the library. - Would you ease up?
I mean, I'm the one who's gonna
have to hold a press conference...
when we're seen together, right?
- Right. - Okay, now let's get
this deal straight one more time.
Um, we