pay it. Only find her, save her.
All right, King. You just made a deal.
One princess for 1 million space bucks.
What's she driving?
A brand-new white Mercedes...
2001 SEL limited edition.
Moon roof, all-leather interior.
I got it at a very good price. I paid cash.
My cousin, Prince Murray,
has a dealership in the valley.
- He was very nice to me.
- We get the idea.
- Where was she last seen?
- She was just passing Jupiter Two.
We'll find her.
Please bring her back safely.
And if it's at all possible, try to save the car.
1 million space bucks!
We'll be able to pay off Pizza the Hutt!
Give me paw!
What's happening?
What's that glow?
- We're not moving.
- We're moving, all right.
Backwards.
Look, there's our princess.
She's got company.
Oh, no. Spaceballs!
And they've already got her
in their magnetic beam.
We're too late. What a shame.
I'll throw her in reverse.
We'll get out of here.
No! Bad.
What are we doing risking our lives
for a runaway princess?
- I know we need the money, but...
- Listen...
we're not just doing this for money.
We're doing it for a shitload of money.
You're right.
And when you're right, you're right.
And you, you're always right.
Okay, we save her. But how?
The minute we move in there,
they're gonna spot us on their radar.
Not if we jam it.
You're right.
- Down scope.
- Down scope.
Radar about to be jammed.
Shit.
- Sir.
- What is it?
Can I talk to you for a minute, please, sir?
- Well?
- I'm having trouble with the radar, sir.
You don't need that, Private.
We're right here. What is it?
I'm having trouble with the radar, sir.
Now what is it?
- I'm having trouble with the radar.
- What's wrong?
I've lost the bleeps, the sweeps,
and the creeps.
- The what? And the what?
- You know. The bleeps.
The sweeps.
And the creeps.
That's not all he's lost.
Sir. The radar, sir.
It appears to be...
jammed.
Jammed.
Raspberry.
Well, there's only one man
who would dare give me the raspberry.
Lone Starr!
What was that?
Never mind that. What was that?
Hi.
- Who are you?
- Barf.
Not in here, mister. This is a Mercedes.
- No, that's my name. Barf.
- Barf?
What are you?
I'm a Mawg: half man, half dog.
I'm my own best friend.
What do you want?
Your father hired Capt. Lone Starr and me
to save you.
We got to hop up this ladder and get out.
Good. Quick. Hurry, darling. Follow the dog.
Mawg. I'm a Mawg.
Wait. What about my matched luggage?
- Stop looking up my can.
- Sorry.
Checking in? What the hell is all that?
- It's Her Royal Highness's matched luggage!
- What?
Her Royal Highness's matched luggage.
Matched luggage, huh?
What's she think this is, a Princess Cruise?
- Well, she wouldn't go without it.
- Oh, yeah?
Now hear this. The minute we get
out of here, the first thing we do is...
dump the matched luggage.
What was that?
Now you hear this, whoever you are.
You will not touch that luggage.
And furthermore,
I want this pigsty cleaned up.
I will not be rescued in such filth.
Listen. On this ship,
I don't take orders, I give them.
This is my dreamboat, sweetheart.
Sweetheart?
How dare you speak to me that way?
You will address me in the proper manner
as Your Royal Highness.
I am Princess Vespa...
daughter of Roland, King of the Druids.
That's all we needed.
A Druish princess.
Funny. She doesn't look Druish.
Now we will show her
who is in charge of this galaxy.
Hold it. I'll handle this personally.
Jawohl, Lord Helmet!
So, Princess Vespa...
you thought you could outwit
the imperious forces of Planet Spaceball.
Well, you were wrong.
You are now our prisoner.
And you will be held hostage
until such time...
as all of the air is transferred
from your planet...
to ours.
She's not in there.
Radar repaired, sir.



------------------------------

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