kids' hearing.
It was real! It looked real, didn't it?
I thought it was real gun.
Didn't it look real when I fell down?
What?
Didn't it look real?
What?
Are you happy now, Clark?
She's deaf.
What's the difference? It was fun
anyway. Let's have a drink.
Pardon me, sir?
Catherine told us to follow 50.
I was thinking of taking
a detour to Liberal.
What for?
The House of Mud.
What's that?
The largest, freestanding
mud dwelling ever built!
The pioneers didn't have bricks,
so they used mud.
They didn't use mud, they used sod!
Right, Audrey.
When they ran out of sod,
they used mud!
Let's skip The House of Mud.
Dodge City was enough for today.
And Catherine and Eddie
are expecting us.
It's living history.
But, if you would rather visit
your cousins...
...it's okay with me.
I would rather see
a pile of mud than Eddie.
Stop it!
What's going on?
Rusty is licking his hand
and touching me with it!
Tell Rusty to behave himself.
Rusty, behave yourself!
But Audrey is eating candy and
smiling at me with her mouth open!
Audrey, eat with you mouth closed!
No eating in the car, kids!
You suck, you know that?
Retard!
I am trying to concentrate on the road!
"I've had some Ionely nights
"And I'll admit I cried sometimes
"Cause you were out of my life
"But then you called my name
"And you came back again
"I feel so inspired
"Kissing your lips of fire
"Little boy sweet, little boy sweet,
"Sweet little boy of mine
"Come a little closer"
You're driving 80 miles an hour!
Doesn't seem that fast, honey?
Slow down!
I don't know why,
we're making good time.
"Love for sale
"Appetizing, yummy love..."
They're here! Eddie, come on!
I can't believe it's been so long!
Eddie, you look terrific.
Come and meet your cousins!
Look how they've grown!
You have lost weight, Catherine!
She's added a few more mouths
to the litter.
Rusty and Audrey,
cousins Vicki and Dale.
And this is Eddie Junior and Junior.
The little one hanging onto
my skirt is Daisy-Mabel.
How old are you, little one.
She was born without a tongue, Clark.
But don't worry about her. She whistles
like a bird and eats like a horse.
Take your cousins out back
and show them your worm farm.
Come in the house, Ellen.
I've so much to tell you.
Look at that car!
That's the Family Truckster.
Boy, she's a beaut!
I like those "green walls."
We had some trouble in St. Louis.
Well, you're looking really...
...fit.
This is your homestead, huh?
Yeah, I don't know for how long, though.
The bank's been after me like
flies on a rib roast.
I know the feeling.
Oh, fuck it!
I bet you could use a cool one?
Now you're talking.
I'm going steady.
And I French kiss.
So? Everyone does that.
Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best.
Want a worm?
No, thanks.
Do you have Pac-Man?
No.
Space Invaders?
No.
Do you have Asteroids?
No, but my dad does.
He can't even sit on the toilet
some days.
What do you do here, Dale?
Well, I have a stack of
nudie books this high.
She's beautiful!
Would you sell me any of them?
Shit, no! I cherish them!
And I use them a lot!
How do you use a magazine?
I'll tell you how.
A guy taught me something
really neat, last year.
Have you ever bopped your bologna?
I guess we are 11, right?
No, we are 12 with Aunt Edna.
Aunt Edna? Is she still alive?
You bet!
I can't wait to see the look
on Clark's face when he hears that.
She came to help when
Eddie ruptured his spleen...
...and she's been here ever since.
She wanted to go back
to Phoenix last year...
...but Eddie wouldn't let her.
Without her Social Security,
we'd never be able to live like this.
It looks as though you've really
got your hands full.
Oh, it's not so bad!
Eddie says after the baby comes,
I can quit one of my night jobs.
How do you like yours, Clark?
Oh, medium rare, a little pink inside.
No! Your bun! Light or dark?
Either way, it doesn't matter.
Vicki, can I help you
stir that? Please?
I don't know why