very good mood.
- I don't want to be a party to this.
- Don't be such a tight ass.
- I am not a tight ass.
I merely believe there are certain limits.
- I'll make you a deal.
- Absolutely not.
A couple of hits on this...
...and I will...
- Of course, you're not interested.
- Gimme that.
This is to demonstrate
that I have a certain freedom of choice...
...that I am not a square person...
...and I am, if I wish to be, perfectly hep.
I'm hip, you're hep.
How come you and Miss Weyderhaus
don't mess around?
I told you.
How come you and Miss Weyderhaus
don't mess around?
I told you.
Because she's fragile...
...because she's fragile, right?
- She's worried about her hands.
- She doesn't want to hurt her hands.
- She could wear boxing gloves.
They're beautiful, her hands.
She oils them.
She oils them?
Like the tin woodsman?
Exactly. To keep them supple.
She's an extraordinary human being.
She sounds like a drag.
Yes, she does.
Is that a door?
I think that was a door.
Did somebody come in?
- Unless one of us went out.
- Felix?
That is a definite person.
- Correct.
- Felix are you there?
- You are about to meet Mrs. Weyderhaus.
- Mother, is Felix here?
- Miss Weyderhaus.
- His clothes are all around here.
Couldn't we put it off for a while?
Anyone in there?
They're very understanding.
Just be yourself.
- I haven't much choice.
- Hello, anybody there?
Mrs. Weyderhaus, this is Doris Wellington,
a friend of mine.
Hi, Mrs. Weyderhaus.
- Mother, my bed is broken...
- And Ann Weyderhaus...
...I'd like you to meet Doris Washington.
Hello, Miss Weyderhaus.
I've heard so much about you from...
...Felix here.
- What's going on?
- What's up in there?
- Mr. Weyderhaus...
...allow me to...
- Doris!
"Doris"?
- What are you doing?
- "Doris"?
Jesus Christ!
That's "bombs away"!
That's the guy with the smock.
You know, with the hard boiled eggs.
Where are you rushing?
Jesus, you walk so fast.
- Where do you think you're going?
- I don't know.
- Stop following me.
- I'm not following you.
I happen to be going in the same direction
you are, but you're going faster than I am.
Doris, I want to be alone now.
Will you please let me
explain something to you?
What is it?
You're depressed now because
you're not used to smoking grass.
Yes, Doctor?
You got very high
and you've come down real hard.
That can be very depressing.
The first time I got stoned I came down
and didn't feel like a human being.
I felt like a cockroach or something.
- Kafka.
- Yeah like a Kafka.
You just never know what's gonna happen.
You gotta be careful.
I'll be careful from now on.
I'm going to be extra careful
not to become involved in anybody's life.
It's not good for them
and it's not good for me.
- What about last night?
- What about last night?
- We made love. Wasn't that good?
- You've got your terminology confused.
- That was not making love.
- It beat the hell out of drying the dishes.
What we did was to get a fast thrill.
One time is a fast thrill.
Six times is making love.
You want to know what we did?
Come on, I'll show you what we did.
- What? Felix!
- I'll show you something.
Look over there.
That's what we did.
With just as little sense or purpose.
- No.
- Maybe that's what you and I are about.
- Maybe that's what we're good for.
- What?
Being each other's pets.
Would you enjoy that?
People love their pets.
You want to be my pet, Doris?
You could wear a nice collar
and sleep in a corner in a box.
I'd lock you in the bathroom at night.
No running around the neighborhood.
- I don't understand what you're saying.
- I could wash you, and bathe you...
...but we've already done that.
- I could teach you tricks.
- Don't.
You could learn to sit up,
play dead, roll over.
- You're scaring me.
- What about retrieving?
Retrieving is an easy one.
- Come on.
- Stop it!
- There's a stick.
- Stop it.
Stick. There's the stick. Okay, fetch.
Go ahead,