May the Force be with you, spaceman.
Get the fuck out of here.
Dude drives a $50,000 wheel
and lays a cuter on me.
I can do better cleaning crap
out of cuckoo clocks.
I'm gonna take the family
out to dinner with this?
You have the wrong attitude
about this job, Eddie.
You gotta appreciate
the Zen aspects.
Zen aspect? What's a Zen aspect?
-Joey, you holding out on me?
-No.
You doing reefer, or is the old lady
on her cycle again?
Why do you ask that?
Because once a month you get
bullshit-philosophical.
It happens when you're married, Eddie.
Didn't that happen to you?
No way. I'm old-fashioned.
I'd go to the Cubs game and drink.
Miss the whole thing.
Maybe that's why you're
not married anymore.
Angles Ryan again. Third time today.
Fourth. You were in the can.
Isn't that White Fang talking to him?
He got the teeth on a postal rap.
The feds are good about dental work.
Bring it in, come on.
A little more.
Okay, put it in neutral.
You want the super wax
with the Rust-O-Protector--?
Just a regular wash.
Thank you.
Do the ashtray?
I don't smoke. Get out of here.
Going down, Joey, I know it.
If we get them after the exchange,
they'll cop possession without intent.
What are you doing?
Joey...
...l hope you appreciate the
Zen aspects of what I'm about to do.
Police!
What the fuck?
What's the matter with you?
What are you doing?
Police! Open up! Open up!
Chicago Police!
Get the fuck out!
What are you, nuts?
Joey, get the bag.
Police! You're under arrest!
Put it in there!
Get that out of here!
You're gonna destroy my interior!
I'll fuck you up now, boy!
Let go, Ryan!
The keys!
Give me the goddamn keys, Ryan!
Get out of the car!
Let's go! Come on!
Let's go!
Get out of the fucking car.
Get them up there!
You got a piece?
Down! Down!
Down! Fucking move,
and you're dead meat!
It's grass.
All we got is grass.
Rat shit.
Three frigging days I'm
out there washing cars.
You disrespect me with this shit?
-We're sending you up.
-Hard time, Ryan.
Come on. It was less than a pound.
-That is a felony, dipshit!
-You're a three-time loser.
Take it easy. Take it easy.
You guys are playing it all wrong.
One of you is supposed to be nice.
Youse both not supposed to be hard.
Hard?
You don't know hard. You're going
to the joint with the brothers.
Know what they'll do to your ass?
-Hey, a little bit of reefer was--
-Sit down!
Take it easy, will you?
You guys wanna make a deal?
All right. I'll give you something.
Let's see.
I got a record store.
They got hot TVs. They got stereos.
You give me a two-bit fence
after making me wash cars?
-You know what that does to me?
-I can think of bookies!
You're doing hard time
for pushing smoke!
Six years, minimum!
No, wait. Wait a minute!
You guys can't put me away.
I got freckles, for chrissakes!
I got something for you!
I got a hit!
They want me to kill somebody.
You?
Who's the target?
I don't know.
-Don't insult our intelligence.
-A guy from New Orleans. I swear.
Wants me to wax some guy out.
I'm supposed to meet him.
This guy, he knows your face?
This has gotta be worth something.
Where's the meeting?
Tonight at the Stockyard lnn at 9:00.
He's gonna be with a girl.
A real heart-stopper.
She's got a tattoo on her shoulder.
That's all I know.
My hat! My cigarettes! Hey!
Why don't we check out that
New Orleans guy?
Come on, I'm tired. I wanna go home.
What's so great about going home...
...finding a bongo player
in the rack with your old lady?
She's not like that.
My wife left a typewritten note
on the refrigerator...
...saying she was leaving
so she could breathe.
Last time it was on
the bathroom mirror.
Get your facts straight, Jillette.
I'm trying to share a valuable,
personal experience with you.
Don't drink my coffee
from my cup, Jillette!
I swear, I met a better
type of cop in Vice.
Crabs and gonorrhea,
that's all I worried about.
It's just a cup, Stemkowski.
Captain