But they do have animals.
Pets!
This is the first in a line of cards...
...that people can send themselves...
...from their pets!
"Dear master:
"I painted you a birthday card
"And it's a real dead ringer
"But it's awful hard to paint
'Cause I don't have thumbs or fingers"
Okay, I love it!
He loves it!
-He loves it!
-He loves it?
Welcome to the Good Boy
Dog Obedience School...
...where there is no such thing,
no, as a bad dog.
Only stubborn ones.
When you and your precious
pooches leave this class...
...you will leave side by side.
You, the master,
your dog, your faithful servant...
...without leashes.
I expect every dog to pay attention.
Are you a hard case, boy?
Is he a hard case?
I don't know.
I've been training the canine species
for 27 years, son.
I think I know an attitude problem
when I see one.
This is how we handle the hard case,
people. Pay attention.
Or, you know, you can have cards
pets could send to each other.
You know, like a dog
could send a cat a get well soon card.
Or love letters for rabbits.
Happy Groundhog Day cards, Bill.
Maybe I'm getting ahead of myself.
Okay, that's brilliant. We need to have
our lawyers talk on Monday.
We got a percentage deal to work out.
Ciao, baby!
-Ciao.
-Ciao.
Yes!
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah!
-Say my name, say my name!
-Richard!
That's a step in the right direction.
And the amazing thing is,
I owe it all to Beethoven.
This is an obstacle course.
When I'm finished with your dogs,
they'll be able to negotiate this course...
...automatically!
It may seem difficult at first,
but don't give up.
You are the master.
Your dog must obey.
Over!
This is one of the commands
that you'll be learning.
Our friend here just doesn't know it yet.
Not too smart, are you, pal?
Okay, pal, I guess we're
going to do this the hard way.
SARA: Go! Go on, Beethoven!
RUTLEDGE: Students, one last thing:
Never let go of the leash.
Over!
Now, what we have--
[Screams]
Wait, wait, wait!
[New Dog Old Tricks by Kip Lennon plays]
Wait!
Stop! Stay, stay!
Heel! Roll over! Fetch!
[Triumphant chuckle]
[Groans loudly]
[In high-pitched voice] This means war.
[High-pitched angry muttering]
Reg, can you just
put that thing away for once?
Just e-mailing ahead
to make sure the pro's ready.
Maddy, Simmons
has taken Michelangelo to the groomer's.
But your feng shui instructor
will be here soon.
But, Mom, Dad said
he would roller-blade with me today.
Honey, she's right.
[Beeping]
What the heck is that?
Thanks, honey.
-Reg, what are you doing?
-I was going roller-blading with Maddy.
We're playing tennis.
Madison has a very full schedule,
just like we do.
Sweetheart, don't forget.
Your Taiwanese slap-fighting
instructor will be here at 4:00. 'Bye!
[Melancholic instrumental music]
SARA:
He was pretty nice about it, actually.
BRENNAN: Yeah. He just didn't want
to give me my money.
You know what?
No math grade is worth this humiliation.
I quit. You're on your own.
Hi. Am I too late for class?
You just....
[Brennan stammers]
SARA: You just missed it.
GIRL: Darn.
Well, is it every week?
Yeah. You can sign up over there.
GIRL: Okay, great. Thanks.
I guess I'll see you next weekend.
Great dog.
SARA: 'Bye.
GIRL: 'Bye.
Too bad you won't be there.
What are you talking about?
I love dog training school.
We've got to practice a lot next week.
So Beethoven doesn't do anything stupid.
SARA: Speaking of stupid,
you should practice talking.
BRENNAN: Shut up.
SARA: You shut up.
BRENNAN: No, you shut up.
SIMMONS: Here we are, Michelangelo.
Time for your lovely bath.
Good boy. Out you come.
Time for your beauty treatment.
Guillermo. Thank you so much
for meeting me halfway.
I had a million things to do
and no time to do them.
Is no problem, Simmons.
I do anything for you,
my burly little muscle dog.
You're so brave

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