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morning, Phoebe.
How are you? It's good to...
If you guys
are trying to manipulate us,
you can throw this whole deal out.
What is going on here?
Who's she?
Uh, a friend. No, she's
an acquaintance, actually.
You begged me to put you on the case,
and this is what I get for it?
I walk in here
and find everybody upset?
And some girl is crying
like we're on Oprah.
I'll take care of it.
Carl, it's gonna be fine.
- What is wrong with you?
- Me?
Yes, you. This whole Kumbaya,
Up With People routine.
- Those people are in real pain.
- Of course they're in pain.
They're separated forever.
Married one day
and the next they're not.
- What sort of awful place is this?
- It's reality.
Well, I think I'd prefer to be
in Andalasia.
- I think I'd prefer that too.
- Get in, please.
I wonder if we might cover
more ground separately, sire.
Uh, you by yourself,
and me with it.
An inspired plan, Nathaniel.
Where do you suppose I should look?
Look, sire! Over there!
Ah! Giselle!
Run to her, sire! Hurry!
Not a moment to lose!
- Giselle!
- I try to do the right thing.
Oh, you've been very nice to me.
Severely punished for it.
OK, look, Giselle?
- I can't help you anymore. OK?
- What?
Here's some money. I want you
to take it. Call your prince.
Have him pick you up,
bring his horse.
Because I honestly,
I just can't handle it.
- Robert?
- Just go.
I'm so sorry.
You have been a very kind friend
to me when I had none.
And I would never want to make you
unhappy or cause you any trouble, so...
...I'll go.
I wish you every happiness.
You have lovely friends.
Would you like to feed
the birds? Just a dollar a bag.
Certainly.
By chance,
have you seen my prince?
He was here.
- Do you really think so?
- Oh, yes.
- Oh!
- Giselle? What are you doing?
- Robert! This is Clara.
- Mm-hmm.
- She saw Edward.
- Oh.
He was on the bus this morning.
- He tried to kill me!
- Great. Wonderful. Thank you.
- Oh!
- What are you thinking?
- You can't just give people money.
- You gave me money.
- That's not the point.
- And she was very helpful.
So, what's the deal,
this prince of yours?
- How long you two been together?
- Oh, about a day.
You mean it feels like a day
because you're so in love?
- No. It's been a day.
- You're kidding me. A day?
- One day?
- Yes.
- And tomorrow will be two days.
- You're joking.
- No. I'm not.
- Yeah, you are.
But I'm not.
You're gonna marry somebody after a day
because you fell in love with him?
Yes.
Yes!
Oh! Ooh!
I don't get it. How can you talk
about loving some guy
- you don't even know?
- Well, I know what's in his heart.
Oh, OK. Great.
This was so yummy.
I didn't know that food
could taste like this.
- You all done? OK.
- Mmm!
- Let me put that out for you.
- What about you?
- How long have you known your Nancy?
- Uh, it's five years.
- And you haven't proposed?
- Well, no. I...
Well, no wonder she's angry.
Hello, nice lady.
You want juicy,
sweet caramel apple, maybe?
Mm.
No charge for the beautiful
young woman.
- Oh, really. It's free?
- Of course!
Today is free caramel apple day.
Tomorrow is free beef... jerky.
Thank you very much, kind sir.
You're welcome, miss.
You...
Shut up.
Most normal people get to know
each other before they get married.
They date.
- Date?
- Yeah. You know, date.
You go someplace special.
You know, like a restaurant,
or a movie, a museum. Or you
just hang out and you talk.
- What do you talk about?
- About each other.
About yourself.
About your interests.
Your likes, your dislikes.
You talk!
You have such strange
ideas about love.
Maybe we should do what you would do.
You meet, have lunch, and get married.
Oh! You forgot
about happily ever after.
Forget "happily ever after."
It doesn't exist.
Well, of course it does.
Oh!
Oh!
I hate to disagree,
but marriages are a success
if they manage not to end.
- Forget about happiness.
- What about you
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