tHis isn't bloody SHakespeare.
(Portuguese) I don't want to drown
saving some sHit my grandmotHer
could Have written.
Just stop. Stop.
(Portuguese) WHat kind of idiot
doesn't make copies?
I really must do copies.
THere'd better not be eels in Here.
(Portuguese) Try not to disturb tHe eels.
OH, wHat tHe Hell is tHat?
THank you. THank you so mucH.
I know. I'll name
one of tHe cHaracters after you.
(Portuguese) Maybe you could name
one of tHe cHaracters after me.
Or give me 50% of tHe profits.
Or I could give you 5% of tHe profits.
(Portuguese) WHat kind of book is it?
- Romance?
- Yes.
It's, erm...
(lmitates Horror film sound effects)
AH, er...
(Portuguese) THriller...crime...
(Portuguese) Sim.
(EnglisH) Crime. Crime, murder.
(Portuguese) FrigHtening? (Gasps)
Er, scary? Yes, sometimes scary.
And, er, sometimes not.
Mainly scary How bad tHe writing is.
Mm.
(Portuguese) I'd better get back to work.
- AH.
- (Portuguese) Later you'll drive me Home?
Sure.
It's my favourite time of day...
driving you.
(Portuguese) It's tHe saddest part
of my day, leaving you.
Sorry.
(TV) 'And coming up
later tHis morning, it's tHis guy...'
¶ THere's no beginning, tHere'll be no end
- ¶ Cos on CHristmas...
- '..tHe bad grandad of rock'n'roll,
'Here at 10:30. Do not switcH off.'
Banoffee pie?
No, tHanks.
THank God. You would've broken my Heart
if you'd said yes.
RigHt, well, lucky you.
- Can I come in?
- Er, yeaH, well, I'm a bit busy...
I was just passing and I tHougHt
we migHt cHeck tHat video tHing out.
I tHougHt I migHt be able
to swap it for some pie
or maybe MuncHies?
Actually, I was serious - I don't know
wHere it is. I'll Have a look tonigHt.
Mark, can I say sometHing?
YeaH.
I know you're Peter's best friend
and I know you've never
particularly warmed to me.
Look, don't, don't argue.
We've never got friendly.
But I wanted to say, I Hope tHat can cHange.
I'm nice. I really am.
Apart from my terrible taste in pie and...
It would be great if we could be friends.
Absolutely. Absolutely.
Great.
Doesn't mean we'll be able
to find tHe video, tHougH.
I Had a real searcH wHen you first called
and couldn't find it so...
THis one says
"Peter and Juliet's Wedding".
Do you tHink we migHt be on tHe rigHt track?
Er, yeaH, well... Wow. THat-tHat could be it.
- Do you mind if l...?
- I've probably taped over it.
Almost everytHing's episodes of West Wing.
OH.
OH, bingo.
THat's lovely.
Well done, you.
OH, tHat's gorgeous.
THank you so mucH, Mark,
tHis is exactly wHat I was Hoping for.
I look quite pretty.
You've stayed ratHer close.
THey're all of me.
(Mark) YeaH. YeaH.
Yes.
But...
you never talk to me.
You always talk to Peter.
You don't like me.
I Hope it's useful.
Don't sHow it around too mucH.
Needs a bit of editing.
Look, I've got to get to a...IuncH.
Early luncH.
You can just sHow yourself out, can't you?
It's a...self-preservation tHing, you see.
(¶ Dido: Here WitH Me)
¶ OH I am wHat I am
¶ I'll do wHat I want
¶ But I can't Hide
¶ And I won't go
¶ I won't sleep
¶ And I can't breatHe
¶ Until you're resting Here witH me
¶ And I won't leave
¶ And I can't Hide
¶ I cannot be
¶ Until you're resting Here
¶ And I won't go
¶ And I won't sleep
¶ And I can't breatHe
¶ Until you're resting Here witH me ¶
- (Knocking)
- YeaH.
Annie, my darling, my dream, my boat.
AH...
- Need you to do a favour for me.
- Of course.
AnytHing for tHe Hero of tHe Hour.
Don't ask me wHy,
and don't read stuff into tHis,
it's just a weird personality tHing.
But, erm, you know Natalie wHo works Here?
THe cHubby girl?
OoH, would we call Her cHubby?
I tHink tHere's a pretty sizeable arse tHere,
yes, sir. Huge tHigHs.
YeaH. Well, wHatever, erm...
I'm sure sHe's a lovely girl
but I wonder if you could, erm...
redistribute Her?
It's done.
Hey, Sammo. Can't sleep?
I got some terrible news today.
Let's Have it.
- Joanna's going back to America.
- Your