clearly it's about His mum
but CHrist, He migHt be injecting Heroin
into His eyeballs for all I know.
(Karen) At tHe age of 1 1?
(Daniel) Well, maybe not His eyeballs, tHen.
Maybe just His veins.
THe problem is His mum
always used to talk to Him, you know, and...
I don't know, tHis wHole stepfatHer tHing
seems suddenly to someHow matter
Iike it never did before.
Listen, it was always going to be
a totally sHit time.
Just be patient.
And maybe cHeck tHe room for needles.
And tHen wHen He sometimes does
come out, it's obvious He's been crying.
It's just sucH a ridiculous waste.
And now if it's going to ruin
Sam's life as well...
I just don't know.
Get a grip.
People Hate sissies.
No one's ever gonna sHag you
if you cry all tHe time.
YeaH. Absolutely.
Helpful.
So, wHat's tHe problem, Samuel?
Is it just Mum or is it sometHing else, HuH?
Maybe scHool?
Are you being bullied?
Or is it sometHing worse?
Can you give me any clues at all?
- You really want to know?
- I really want to know.
Even tHougH you won't be able to Help?
Even if tHat's tHe case, yeaH.
OK. Well...
trutH is, actually...
I'm in love.
Sorry?
I know I sHould be tHinking
about Mum and I am but I'm in love.
I was before sHe died
and tHere's notHing I can do about it.
- Aren't you a bit young to be in love?
- No.
AH, well. OK, well...
I'm a little relieved.
- WHy?
- Because l...
tHougHt it'd be sometHing worse.
Worse tHan tHe total agony of being in love?
Er...
No, you're rigHt.
Total agony.
- NigHt, SaraH.
- NigHt, Karl.
(Mobile)
YeaH, absolutely.
Free as a bird. Fire away.
Alone again.
Naturally.
- I'll deal witH it.
- Mm.
- AH. Natalie.
- Sir.
THanks.
Natalie.
Erm, I'm starting to feel...
uncomfortable about us
working so closely every day
and me knowing so little about you,
it seems elitist and wrong.
Well, tHere's not mucH to know.
Well, erm, wHere do you live, for instance?
WandswortH. THe dodgy end.
- AH, my sister lives in WandswortH.
- OH.
So wHicH exactly is tHe dodgy end?
At tHe end of tHe HigH street,
Harris Street, near tHe queen's Head.
- OH, yeaH, yeaH, tHat is dodgy.
- Hm.
Erm, and you live
witH your Husband? Boyfriend?
- THree illegitimate but cHarming cHildren?
- No.
I've just split up witH my boyfriend, so
I'm back witH my mum and dad for a wHile.
- AH. Sorry.
- No, it's fine.
I'm well sHot of Him.
- He said I was getting fat.
- I beg your pardon?
He said no one'd fancy a girl
witH tHigHs tHe size of tree trunks.
Not a nice guy, actually, in tHe end.
No.
You know, erm...
being Prime Minister,
I could just Have Him murdered.
THank you, sir. I'll tHink about it.
Do. THe SAS are absolutely cHarming.
RutHless, trained killers
are just a pHone call away.
OH, God.
Did you Have tHis kind of problem?
YeaH, course you did, you saucy minx.
So, let's go. We can definitely crack tHis.
Remember, I was a kid once, too.
So, come on, it's someone at scHool. RigHt?
- YeaH.
- UH-HuH. Good, good.
And wHat does sHe, He, feel about you?
SHE doesn't even know my name.
And even if sHe did, sHe'd despise me.
SHe's tHe coolest girl in scHool.
And everyone worsHips Her
because sHe's Heaven.
Good. Good.
Well,
basically you're fucked, aren't you?
(¶ All I Want For CHristmas Is You)
Hi tHere and welcome back.
So, tHree weeks till CHristmas, looks like
tHe real competition is gonna be Blue.
I saw tHem on tHe sHow last week.
THey weren't very nice about my record.
No. Little scamps.
But very, very talented musicians.
YeaH. I understand you've got a prize
for our competition winners.
Yes, I Have, Ant or Dec.
It's a personalised felt-tip pen.
OH, great.
It's brilliant. It even writes on glass,
so if you've got a framed picture,
like, for instance, tHis one of Blue,
you can just write on it.
(Kids snickering)
(Dec) Er, a lot of kids watcHing, Billy.
(Billy) OH, yeaH.
Hiya, kids.
Here's an important message
from your Uncle Bill -
don't buy drugs.