noticin'
that you're outta salami.
I think you oughta have somebody go over
to the delicatessen and bring some more.
Well, you know, it's free.
You don't have to steal it.
If it's free,
then I ain't stealin'.
- How did you get crippled?
- I slipped on a banana peel.
- I gotta sit down. I feel crummy.
- What's the matter?
- Take your hands off of me!
- Why don't you use my shower?
Take a walk! Just take your hands
off of me! Don't touch me!
- Just take a walk!
- Take a shave!
- I'm going to lick the sweat off.
- Keep your hands off of me!
Well, you look hot!
- Guess who I am.
- Who?
It's me!
How you doin'?
You're gettin' your picture took, huh?
[ Chimes Jingling ]
Hi.
[ Making Sizzling Sounds ]
[ Sighing ]
[ Muttering, Growling ]
Hey.
Let's, uh...
leave now.
Your place...
or mine?
- She's hooked.
- Like why a cowboy?
I'd say she was good for 10 bucks,
but I'll ask for 20.
Why a cowboy whore?
Did you know
we were gonna make it?
So, you really
wanna do business?
Who is he?
- [ Joe Laughing ]
- Don't tell me you two are a couple.
- [ Laughing ]
- Hey.
Why are you laughing, Joe?
- Are you really a cowboy?
- I'll tell you the truth now.
I ain't a for-real cowboy,
but I am one hell of a stud.
A very expensive stud,
and I happen to be his manager.
- How much is this gonna cost me?
- Twenty bucks.
- Okay.
- And taxi fare for me.
Oh, get lost, will ya?
I agree, but for that service
I charge one buck taxi fare.
- Okay?
- Yeah, okay, okay, okay.
Oh, boy.
Here.
- Go ahead.
- Give me a break.
I don't even know what your name is.
I wanna know your name. What is it?
- My name's Joe!
- Joe!
Fabulous!
Joe could be anyone.
I like that.
Move over, Joe. Come here, Joe.
Kiss me, Joe.
That's a very good idea.
Why don't you kiss me, Joe?
Oh, my... Wow!
Too much.
He fell.
Hey, fella, you fell.
Is he all right?
Yeah, he's fine.
Well, if you're all right,
why you hangin' on the banister?
- Can't you walk or not?
- Naturally, I can walk.
He's got taxi fare.
- Come on.
- Are you sure you're all right?
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[ Engine Starts ]
Hey, Ratso!
Whoopee-tee-yi-yo, boy!
Whoo-hah!
Well, it happens.
- Don't worry about it.
- It ain't never happened to me before.
You can bet your
bottom dollar on that.
Where's the matches, ma'am?
Over there behind that thing.
Maybe if you didn't
call me 'ma'am'...
things might work out better.
That's the first goddamn time
the thing ever quit on me.
That's a fact.
You think I'm lyin' to you?
No. No, I don't
think you're lying.
I just had this funny image.
I had this image of a...
policeman without his stick...
and a bugler without his horn...
etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.
Oh.
Well, I think
I'm making it worse.
Maybe we oughta
take a little nap...
and see what happens.
- I ain't sleepy.
- Oh.
I know. Scribbage.
Shit!
Look at this here. See?
There's an 'e' in 'money.
I mean, if that's your word.
M-O-N-Y.
That's just exactly how you spell it
on that big building up there.
M-O-N-Y, money.
'Y. What in the hell
starts with 'Y'?
Well, it can end in 'Y'...
like, uh, 'say,' 'pay'...
'lay.
Hey, pay...
lay.
Okay, cut it out now.
That's enough.
You're cheating...
teasin' me so I can't think.
'Gay' ends in 'Y.
Hmm?
- Do you like that?
- Cut that out.
Gay, fay.
Is that your problem, baby?
I'm gonna show you
my darn problem!
[ Laughing ]
Oh! Ow!
I'm not.
I'm not exaggerating.
Listen, Marjorie,
you should try it.
It might be terrific for you.
Oh, for God's sake.
Well, what night
is Phil's poker night?
Well, think.
Yeah, all right.
Joe, are you available
Thursday night?
What time?
Yeah, around 8:30?
Uh, well, let me think now.
Thursday, 8:30.
Uh, well, I guess
I can be available.
Hell, yes!
Hello? Marjorie, it's all set
for Thursday night at 8:30.
Yes, it's... No, I can't talk to you now,
so call me at the office later.
Yeah, okay. Bye-bye.
Ma'am,