crazy, right?
She's moaning and groaning.
I'm humping and bumping.
She's screaming,
"Red Dog One to Red Dog Squadron," right?
All of the sudden she screams,
"Wait a minute!" Right?
She leaps under the bed,
pulls out a five-gallon jerry can.
- Right.
- Opens it up. It's full of gasoline.
She splashes some all over the walls,
whips a fucking Zippo out of her flak suit,
and the whole room
goes up in flames, right?
So the tape recorder's going...
The room's full of smoke, right?
The broad jumps back on the bed
and she screams, "Now! Give it to me now,
"for the love of Christ!"
So I look at the broad,
and I figure, fuck this nonsense.
One, two, six, I'm in the hall,
struggling with my shorts.
Make it to the elevator,
whole place is filled with smoke.
Elevator arrives,
the whole hall's filled with firemen.
You know, those fucking firemen
make out like bandits.
Nobody does it normally anymore.
It's these young broads, Danny.
They don't know what the fuck they want.
Do you think she was a pro?
- A pro, Dan.
- Yeah.
A pro is how you think of yourself.
- See my point?
- Right.
Come on, you scumbags, last inning!
Only one run down!
We hold them down!
We'll catch them in our half!
Todd, get up.
- Who's that over there?
- Where? Where? Where? Where?
- Which one?
- Right there.
- Cute guys.
- Here comes Debbie's boss.
He looks good. Let's see if he can hit.
Come on, Mr. Carlson!
Out! Out, out, out.
Good play, Danny! Good one, Dan.
All right, no stick now. No stick.
That second baseman
has got a really nice ass.
He does.
I refuse to go out with a man
whose ass is smaller than mine.
- Really?
- Me, too.
Your dates are gonna be pretty scarce.
Very nice catch, Danny.
All right, Danny.
...your date, God forbid.
I'm making a beer run. Anybody?
Yeah. Thirsty?
- Thanks.
- No, thank you.
Go get him. Go on.
Oh, God, it's the guy with the cute ass.
- Go for it.
- Come on!
Hey, Bernie! For me and Mother!
Come on, honey!
Here, let me help you.
Do it, Big Bernie, do it!
- Anytime I can give you a hand.
- I'm finished. Just give yourself a hand.
Come on, guys.
Looks good. It's going, it's going. It's gone!
Yeah!
Put me down! Put me down!
Mother's is giving a party tonight!
Winners and losers!
Mr. Carlson, that was such a good game.
Carrie, I don't want to hear about it
right now, okay?
Steve, are you going to Mother's?
I doubt it.
You know, I've been meaning to mention
that it's really stupid to fuck your boss.
I mean, for starters,
it's a damn good way to lose yourjob.
- Guess who walked in here last night?
- Not the redhead.
The redhead was here last night?
What did she say?
- Ask Bernie. He took her home.
- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
You know, the thing about redheads
is lack of pigmentation.
Well, they're almost albino.
- You bang an albino?
- No.
Well, I have, and they're nuts.
Welcome, ladies! Welcome to Mother's.
We're honored. Come on, follow Mother.
- So, where are the guys from your team?
- Sulking.
- First round's on Mother.
- Thank you.
I'll be back in a minute, you guys.
You know, they're gonna come at me
tomorrow like savages.
Marauding beasts bent on destruction.
- Stop it.
- Deborah...
Deborah, you work in advertising, all right?
It is a civilized business.
I, on the other hand, work with monsters.
You're talking about five-year-olds.
Right, and my job is to break their spirit.
That's what kindergarten is all about.
The Germans invented it, Deborah.
Think about it.
Oh, God, Pat's going in for the kill.
That's a nice turn.
- Coy.
- With just a hint of giddiness.
Her big move
should be coming up any moment.
The combination hair flip with a giggle.
There's a 3.2 degree of difficulty here, Joan.
Let's see if she can pull it off.
This is it. This is it.
- Yes.
- Yes.
- Yes!
- Yes!
- Bravo!
- Bravo!
- Bravo! Yes!
- Bravo! 9.0! 9.0!
Now, look it, tell me. Tell me getting these
advertising babes here wasn't