you have here.
-Yeah. We're restoring it.
- Where is Mr Dandrige?
He's away on business.
- Can I help you?
- There was a murder last night.
Your neighbour Charley thinks
he saw the victim in this house.
That's impossible.
I was here with jerry last night.
-Therewas nobody else here.
- That's a lie.
I saw him carry her body out
in a plastic bag.
What doyou say to that?
Kid's crazy. I took some bags out,
but they were full oftrash.
Amy?
Here, let me showyou.
Look, the bag I saw
had a body in it, not trash.
You actually see the body,
Charley?
- Well, no, but--
- Okay.
Let me take you out back I'll show you
the bags I put in the garbage.
- Okay, let's see them.
- I can prove he's lying!
Let's look in the basement
instead.
What's down there, Charley?
Yes, Charley.
What's down there?
Obviously the boy's
made a mistake, Officer.
A coffin! That's what's down there.
I saw them carry it in.
What?
Jerry Dandrige is in it,
sleeping the sleep ofthe undead.
What are you talking about?
- He's a vampire.
- Uh-oh!
I saw him last night. He had fangs,
and he bit her on the neck
For heaven's sake!
- Come on.
- What?
Wait!
We can't just leave like this!
I got a coffin foryou!
I don't care whatyou say!
Lieutenant,
please listen to me!
Look, I'm tellingyou,
Jerry Dandrige is a vampire.
Sure, and I'm Dirty Harry.
Listen.
If I ever catch your ass at the station
again, I'm throwing it in jail forever!
Lieutenant,
just listen to me for a second!
I know it's crazy!
I know that, but--
Look, Lieutenant--
Oh, my God.
Evil!
And to what do I owe
this dubious pleasure?
The vampire knows
I know about him.
Or at least he will
when he wakes up tonight.
What are you talking about?
Avampire is living
next doorto me...
and he's gonna kill me
if I don't protect myself.
- What?
- I haven't got time to explain.
Just tell me what to do
to protect myself.
Very funny, Brewster.
Evil, please!
I'm not kidding!
- Tell me what to do!
- Don't call me Evil any more!
Why should I help you anyway?
Look, I've got eight bucks.
Help me and it'syours.
Far be it from me
to turn down a fool's money.
Where and when doyou expect
the vampire to attack?
In my bedroom, tonight.
Start with this.
Butyou must have total faith in it
for it to work
Then get some garlic.
Links ofthe stuffyou can wear around
your neck and hang from yourwindow.
Ifhe comes foryou,
that'll be theway. Then--
Oh, of course!
There's holywater!
Butyou gotta get a priest
to say a blessing over it first.
- That's it?
- I'm afraid so.
Butyour best protection
right now, Charles...
is that a vampire
cannot enteryour house...
without being invited
by the rightful owner first.
- Are you sure?
- Positive.
Thankyou. Thankyou.
Charley, could you come here, please?
There's someone I'd likeyou to meet.
Yeah, Mom.
Charley, this is
our next-door neighbour...
Jerry Dandrige.
Hello, Charley.
Charley, don't be rude.
Shake hands.
- What's he doing here?
- I invited him for a drink
You what?
I invited him over.
Why?
What's the matter, Charley?
Afraid I'd never come over
without being invited first?
You're quite right.
Of course, now that
I've been made welcome...
I'll probably drop by
quite a bit.
In fact,
anytime I feel like it.
With your mother's
kind permission, of course.
Oh,jerry, anytime.
It's nice that someone interesting has
finally moved into the neighbourhood.
Charley, are you all right?
Yeah, Mom, I'm fine.
I just gotta get back
to my trig.
Nice to meetyou.
Seeyou.
Soon.
We wouldn'twant towake
your mother, would we?
Then I'd have to kill her too.
Right?
Doyou realize how much trouble
you've caused me?
Spying on me.
Almost disturbing my sleep
this afternoon.
Telling policemen about me!
You deserve to die, boy.
Of course, I could giveyou
something I don't have.
A choice.
Forget about me, Charley.
Forget about me,
and I'll forget aboutyou.
What doyou say,