came up here for a reason.
I came here to talk to you
about an investment.
In fact, I came up to solicit
$25,000 from you.
I knew it, I knew it, I knew it.
Look, a unique investment opportunity
came my way
and I'm thinking of people
that I'm gonna bless with this chance
cos this is so good it should be illegal.
- And it probably is.
- It's not.
It's inside but it's not illegal.
The upside is phenomenal,
the downside is zip.
I'm thinking about who I could involve
in this and your name came up.
Why? Because you are family.
If a guy can't help his family,
what good is he?
I came up here to offer you a chance
to make some big money.
It's funny you didn't mention this before.
- You didn't want to talk about money.
- Baloney!
(Roman) I was picking my moment.
(Chet) You were picking your nose.
There's no mystery here, Chet.
- I know how you really feel about me.
- Do you?
Yep.
I knew if I gave you something,
you'd figure there'd be strings.
- Is that a fact?
- Yeah, that's a fact.
At our wedding...
you were in the john, with Kate
and Connie's dad, you were talking.
Do you happen to remember
the substance of that conversation?
- No, I don't.
- Well, I do.
It's one I'll never forget
because I heard you say, and I quote,
"That Roman Craig
is a crooked son of a bitch."
The next time you stab somebody in
the back, check under the stalls for feet.
You may think I'm made out of armor
but I'm just like any other human being
and when I get cut it hurts
and that cut me.
And I hurt.
Roman, I'm...
I'm sorry, I...
I had a lot to drink that night and, er...
I really don't remember saying that
but if you said I did...
then...
I must have.
I apologize to you both.
It was a terrible thing to say.
I don't hold grudges
and I don't have any hard feelings.
To show you I can forgive and forget,
I'd still like to offer you
a piece of that investment.
Sweetie.
I don't know what to say, Roman, I...
I feel like a real idiot.
- What is this thing?
- 25,000. What's your cash position?
It isn't 25,000,
that's an awful lot of money.
Can you get it?
No!
I, er... I think I can make an arrangement
or two at the bank on Monday.
Look, whatever you want to do.
You can write a cheque now
and I'll make up the difference.
If that's OK?
Is your chequebook in the purse?
- Yeah.
- (Chet) Great. Then that's fine.
- Bye.
- Goodbye.
I think it's a real testament
to the strength of the family
that we can disagree so vehemently
and get on each other's nerves so badly
over the past week
and still part on good terms.
Absolutely.
After all the disagreements you two had,
you still thought to include him
in that investment.
It was a wonderful moment of trust on
his part that he wrote you that cheque.
That's a lot of money for him. From what
I gather, it's half a year's salary.
It may well be
Ben and Buck's college money.
You have a knack with money and I think
it's great you're sharing it with him
and that he accepted your offer,
that he trusts you
with his financial wellbeing.
Oh, I hope this investment
really works out for them.
(Tires screech)
- I got to go back.
- Did you forget something?
- You're scaring me, are you all right?
- I will be once I settle this.
(Kate) Roman, what are you doing?
- Katie, sit down.
- What?
You'll need to sit down
to hear what I have to say.
- Gee, it's wet.
- Hurry up.
Let's go.
Chet, I'm gonna level with you.
I'm a phony, a fraud, a fake.
From my imitation Bally slip-ons
to our replicated Rolexes.
We're broke. We're bankrupt.
We're busted.
We're busted?
We were living well, right?
Well beyond our means.
I haven't been trading in over two years.
This deal looked good,
I got overextended,
couldn't meet my calls.
I lost my seat on the exchange.
I go to work every morning.
Now I wear a blue runner's jacket
and fetch coffee.
I lost everything.
Did you think
that I wouldn't understand?
Baby, I knew you'd