hungry.
Have you ever been so hungry
on a date...
...that when the girl goes to the
bathroom, you eat her food?
You said the waiter ate my crab cake.
So, Ross, now why did
that first marriage break up?
Was it because the woman was straight
or because she was a lesbian?
- Do you two know each other?
- No.
But he seems like
a guy who'd marry a woman...
...on the verge of being a lesbian
and then push her over the edge.
Wait a minute!
Were you on a poster for gonorrhea?
Have you ever slept
in the same bed with a monkey?
You leave Marcel out of this!
Fine! You ever gotten stuck
in a pair of leather pants?
Have you ever locked yourself
in a TV cabinet, VD-boy?
Monkey-lover!
Where do you think we lost her?
Probably around gonorrhea.
- Hi, honey, I'm home!
- Don't come in here!
Why, do you have another
boyfriend in there?
No. We only mess around at his place.
I started it, but now it's scaring me,
so could you come out here?
I'm wearing a wedding dress.
You got a wedding dress?
- Yeah, but I'm not keeping it.
- Then why can't I see it?
Oh. I guess you can.
But I have to return it,
so you can't like it.
Okay, I promise. I'll hate it.
Wow. You look hideous.
Really?
Yeah. That's like the most
ugliest dress I've ever seen.
Why do you have to return it?
Because it doesn't really fit.
Oh, I booked The Swing Kings.
Oh, that's great. Thanks.
But that dress is terrible.
- It makes me want to rip it off you.
- Okay.
But you can't rip it.
Well, maybe a little.
Guys, you want to look
at the song list for the wedding?
Guys?
I thought you'd be gone all day.
All right, what's going on?
I'm sorry. I should probably
leave you girls alone.
Laugh all you want, but in 10 minutes
we'll have younger-looking skin.
You know, she could use a little... .
Oh, nice shot! Yeah!Guys, you won't believe this!
- I just talked to my agent...
- Oh, my God!
I'm sorry. Too soon. You go.
I got nominated for
Days of Our Lives!
- Good for you!
- Congratulations!
I can't believe you're nominated
for an Emmy!
- Soap Opera Digest Award?
- No. I'm up for a "Soapie. "
Is that something you're making up?
No, no, no, it's real!
And it has been, since 1998.
I'm up for a Soapie!
Oh, my God!
My God! That's the third most
prestigious soap opera award there is!
Thank you! I guess we know
who I'll take to the awards!
Don't kid about that!
Will all the stars be there?
Many are scheduled to appear.
- I can't go. I'll be too nervous!
- I'll go.
You're getting married.
This is all I have.
The One With Joey's Award
English Subtitles by
SDI Media Group
Ernest Muhlbrat hypothesized that the
velociraptor, when threatened...
...would expand its collar and
emit a high-pitched noise...
...to frighten off predators.
Mr. Lewis?
What kind of noise?
Just a high-pitched,
intimidating noise.
But like how?
Well, we don't know for sure.
But in my head,
it sounded something like this:
Of course, this is just conjecture.
Okay. That's all for today.
Mr. Morse,
can I see you for a moment?
Yes, sir?
I need to talk to you
about your midterm exam.
- I'm afraid I had to fail you.
- Why?
Well, you need 60% to pass.
- What did I get?
- Seven.
That's not so good.
No, no, it's not.
What happened, Ned?
Maybe you can cut me some slack.
I'm sort of in love.
I'm sorry, but that's
really not my problem.
I'm in love with you.
That brings me in the loop a little.
That's why I did so bad on this test.
I'm having a hard time concentrating.
When you're up there
and you're teaching...
...and your face gets all serious... .
You look so good. When you wear that
tight little turtleneck sweater...
I'm your teacher. I'm sorry.
You're a student.
And I like women.
In spite of what may be written
on the backs of these chairs.
That guy at the counter's
totally checking you out.
Really?
- Oh, my God, he's really cute!
- Go for it.
Phoebe, I'm engaged.
I'm saying, get his