Oh, this is crazy.
- Can't we just flip a coin?
- No, coins hate me.
Okay, fine. You know what?
We will let Ross and Joey decide.
Hi!
Ross, sweetie.
Hey there, handsome thing.
Wow, this cologne really is
every bit as good as Giorgio.
Hey.
Just brought back your videos.
Hey, Ross. Look, I think
we need to talk about before.
No. No, we don't.
Yes, we do.
Now, look.
That was the best nap I ever had.
I don't know what
you're talking about.
Come on, admit it.
That was the best nap you ever had.
I've had better.
Okay. When?
All right! All right!
It was the best nap ever!
I said it, okay?
But it's over, Joey!
I want to do it again.
We can't do it again.
- Why not?
- Because it's weird!
Fine.
You want a drink?
- Sure. What do you got?
- Warm milk and Excedrin PM.
Chandler.
I just figured out who you are.
Can you figure out what I'm doing?
- You're Louis Posen.
- Who?
He was my best friend in fifth grade.
One day, I asked him to be
my boyfriend and he said no.
Do you know why?
Because you kept talking to him while
he was trying to go to the bathroom?
No, but because he thought
I was too fa...
Every time I think about it,
I feel as bad as I did then.
I really think you should
apologize to Julie.
Honey, are you kidding?
That was like 16 years ago.
It would make me feel better
if Louis apologized to me.
I'll do it. But I warn you,
this may make me a better person.
And that is not the man
you fell in love with.
Okay, we'll give you hypothetical
maid-of-honor situations.
You'll be scored
on a scale of one to ten.
- One being the highest.
- Ten is the highest.
- Why is 10 the highest?
- Because it's the highest.
Okay, Rachel, you're up first.
Situation number one:
You're with Monica.
The wedding is about to start
when Monica gets cold feet. Go!
I don't want to marry Chandler.
- I've got cold feet.
- It's gonna be okay.
One man the rest of my life?
I don't know.
This means I'll never
get to sleep with Joey.
Look, Monica...
...getting cold feet is very common.
It's just because
of all the anticipation.
And you just have to remember
that you love Chandler.
And also, I ran out on a wedding.
You don't get to keep the gifts.
Drawing on your own experience.
Very good.
Yes, very nice, Rachel.
Thank you, judges.
- Kiss ass.
- Oh.
- Okay, Phoebe.
- Yes, Your Honor.
We're now in the ceremony.
Monica is about to say, "I do"...
...when her drunk uncle
starts yelling.
What do you do? Go!
When Monica was a little girl...
...I remember that...
Ow!
- Very good!
- Oh.
Yes, excellent. Perfect score.
She just made a scene
in the middle of the ceremony!
Hey, you want
a little taste of Pheebs?
It is time for you to give
your maid-of-honor speech.
We haven't even prepared...
- Go!
- Okay, okay, okay.
Webster's Dictionary
defines marriage as...
Okay, no! Forget that! That sucks!
Okay, never mind. Forget it.
I met... I met Monica when we were
just a couple of 6-year-olds...
...and became friends with Chandler
when he was 25...
...although he seemed
like a 6-year-old.
Oh.
Thank you. Thank you very much.
I've known them
separately and together.
To know them as a couple is to know
that you are in the presence of love.
So I would like to raise my glass...
...to Monica and Chandler...
...and the beautiful adventure they
are about to embark upon together.
I can think of no two people
better prepared for the journey.
Wow.
- Great speech.
- Yeah, it really was.
Oh, thanks.
Okay, Phoebe, I guess you're next.
Although I really don't see the point.
Okay.
I can't believe that Monica
and Chandler are getting married.
I remember talking
about this day with Rachel...
...while we were
showering together, naked.
And she's back in the game!
Julie. Hi.
Chandler Bing.
I guess you remember me.
Hello, Skidmark.
It's a nickname. I'll explain later.
It's pretty clear.
I owe you a long, overdue apology.
I shouldn't have broken up with